A Broken Heart
by SparkleInTheSun
Summary: A broken heart can change even the most amazing person,it can put those drugs in her body,it can take that blade to her skin. But he didn't break her heart, he shattered it into a thousand pieces and she doesn't know if it will ever heal again.
1. Trailer

**Disclaimer: I don't own Sonny With A Chance, I may one day though :)**

**Then you would all be jealous. **

**~ Trailer ~ **

**She was so happy, she had everything she had ever dreamed of....**

"You have a little ice cream by there..." He grinned at her as he dipped his finger in the ice cream, wiping it on her cheek. Sonny gasped in surprise, before a massive grin broke out, both of them laughing loudly.

**But one day, she met other people... **

"Why are you hanging around with them, Sonny."

"Well maybe I just got fed up of hanging around with losers like you."

**They started to lose her.. **

"You missed school today, I copied down some notes for you."

"Whatever, screw school and screw you, freak."

**Nobody can see just how much pain she is in...**

I look down at my arm, covered in cuts, filled with my pain but nobody can know this, nobody will ever know...

**Her mother worries about her...**

"She skipped school and rehearsal again... if this carries on then she is going to be chucked off the show Connie."

"I don't know what to do about her any more, I don't know how I can help her."

**Her friends are warned to stay away from her...**

"Hey!"

"Look, we ain't allowed to speak to you any more unless it's to do with the show. Just leave us alone, sorry."

**They think sending her away is the only way to help her... **

"I don't know how to help you any more."

"Maybe I don't want help."

**She wants to go home...**

"I am ready, please mum, let me come home."

"I can't let you honey, you're not ready yet. That much is clear to me."

"Fine then, but you will regret this."

**She admits to everything...**

"I do drugs, I drink, I mess around with boys... men... I sneak out late, I party till various hours in the morning, I cut myself, I steal money, I ignore my best friends, I wish I had the guts to kill myself all the time.. and I have no idea why."

**Will she get the help she needs? **

**Will she finally accept herself for who she is?**

**Find out soon in "Falling Apart." **

**Drop me a review, telling me if this is worth carrying on. **

**I don't mind if you think it's a crap idea!**

**But if you want to see it on here, review and let me know what you think.**

**Would mean a lot. **


	2. April

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter One ~ **

"Right, so it's my house tonight?" Sonny grinned at Tawni, the two girls had become amazing friends over the past year – of course, with a few typical ups and downs mostly down to Tawni but other than that, the two of them spent most of their time together.

"I can't wait, a nice night in." Sonny giggled, her arm in Tawni's as they walked down the corridors of the 'So Random!' set.

"Oh great, April is coming our way." Tawni muttered, rolling her eyes as the new co-actor of McKenzie falls headed their way, a cigarette in her mouth as she did. Sonny laughed a little,

"She's not that bad when you get to know her." She shrugged, grinning at April as she walked up to them, shooting Tawni a dirty look before smiling at Sonny.

"Hi!" Sonny let go of Tawni's arm when she turned around to walk the opposite way from April, obviously waiting for Sonny to join her.

"Want a smoke?" Sonny looked down at the cigarette in her hand, watching as April put it in her mouth, still grinning at her. Suddenly, the sound of Tawni's heels clicking on the floor could be heard, making Sonny gasp when she grabbed her arm, pulling her back slightly with a stern look on her face.

"No she does not! We have to go now, come on Sonny."

"I will catch up in a minute." Sonny hated to admit it but she had always wanted to try something else, something that nobody would expect from her.

"Sonny!" Tawni gritted her teeth, storming off, Sonny laughed when she turned around to see Tawni hanging around at the corner of the corridor, waiting for Sonny to stop talking to the one person she hated more than Chad Dylan Cooper – and that was saying something.

Sonny shrugged, turning back around to face April, taking the cigarette from her and slowly putting it to her mouth,

"Don't suck it in too hard." April advised her, laughing at Sonny as she coughed when she pulled it back out of her mouth, handing it back to her as she smiled.

"You know, you're pretty cool Munroe. Even if you do hang around with a bunch of losers."

"Those losers are my friends, and my co-workers." She muttered, shrugging as she looked behind her and waved to Tawni. Tawni just gave her a look of disgust, turning her head slightly,

"Right, sorry." April rolled her eyes, handing the cigarette back to Sonny, she nodded at her, sucking in the smoke one more time.

"I had better go before she kills me." She finally said, handing it back to her before turning around.

"Yeah, see you around Munroe." Sonny waved behind her, running over to Tawni.

"What the hell were you just thinking?" Tawni put her hands on her hip, reminding Sonny of a mother scolding her naughty child,

"Oh come on Tawni, live a little." She sighed, grabbing Tawni's arm once more as they carried on walking, she knew that Tawni probably would have done the same if it hadn't have been April,

"Can we just forget about it?" She finally said, looking at Tawni with her big, brown eyes, filled with nothing but innocence, grinning when Tawni sighed and gave in, smiling at her best friend as she nodded. Sonny knew that Tawni would love to give her the lecture of her life right now, but she couldn't be bothered for the argument and by the looks of things neither could Tawni.

Maybe tonight would actually end in us still being friends for the first time during a sleepover. Sonny laughed, knowing that Tawni would probably find a way to bring the whole thing up, or start something up – no matter what, their nights in always ended up in one of them storming off and sleeping away from the other. She could only hope that tonight would be different.

**A/N: Please review! This story kind of took me ages to plan, and it's kind of depressing when you write a story and nobody even cares. Yeah, I am one of those people who almost cry when they don't get reviews, or only one review.. it's sad. **

**So, please, please, please, please, please review. Tell me what you think! Tell me that you love it/like it/hate it! Anything! **


	3. Sonny's Dad

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Two ~ **

"I know Mum, but still..."

"Look Sonny, there is no way out of this. You're going to your dad's for the weekend and that's the end of it." Sonny sighs as the looks at her mum,

"But that's not fair, I have plans..."

"You haven't seen him in ages."

"And who's fault is that?" Sonny mutters, as she starts walking out of the door,

"And where do you think you're going?"

"To tell Tawni that I am being sent away for the whole weekend." She screams back at her, slamming the door behind her as she carried on walking, ignoring her calls from behind her. It wasn't fair, he goes travelling for a whole year, and as soon as he comes back he thinks he can walk back into her life again.

She hated him so much sometimes, he walked out on Sonny when he divorced her mum ten years ago. And she really believed she would have been fine just leaving it at that, but then he had to get contact with Sonny after four years, and then just when she was getting close to him all over again, he decided to go off with his new wife and daughter, travelling for a whole year. And now he wanted Sonny back in his life, she sighed loudly as she carried on walking to Tawni's house. They were going to have another sleepover, they had everything planned but now she was stuck spending three whole days with someone she don't even get on with.

"Hey." Sonny grinned as Tawni opened the door, staring at her with a confused look on her face,

"What you doing here so early?"

"I can't come tonight." Sonny sighed, looking up at Tawni as she bit down on her lower lip,

"Why not?"

"Mum wants me to spend time with my dad. I am stuck there for the whole weekend." Sonny walked into the kitchen, jumping up on the kitchen counter as Tawni started to make them both a drink. Sonny heaved a deep sigh as she handed it to her,

"I don't even get on with him Tawni, she knows that, I don't see why she is so intent on me spending time with him."

"Maybe she wants you to have a father in your life." Tawni understood more than anyone, her dad had left a long time ago but unlike Sonny's, he had never got back in contact with her or her mother since.

"I guess, I know she didn't when she was my age, I can see why she would want me to. But still.." She wrinkles her nose in disgust, looking down at the drink she held tight in her hands as she thought about her dad,

"He left us, he didn't care about me for ages after he left and then out of nowhere he suddenly wanted to see me again." She sighed as Tawni looks at Sonny strangely,

"What?"

"You never talk about your dad."

"I know, it's not an easy thing to talk about sometimes. I always used to blame myself for him leaving when I was younger, he never phoned or anything for four whole years, my mum would cry all the time. He ruined everything, we were happy until he left, it seemed like we were never good enough for him. You know?" Tawni nods and then puts her arms around Sonny, who gratefully accepted the sudden act of comfort from the person she least expected it from, wrapping her own arms around her best friend.

"I don't know if I should hate him, or love him..."

"Just make an effort this weekend, try and get on, and see how it goes." She smiles at Sonny, she always gave the best advice, even if the answer seemed so simple and even if it did come from Tawni.

"I should get going." She jumps off the counter quickly,

"He is picking me up in about an hour. Wish me luck." She muttered, rolling her eyes,

"Good luck, will miss you tonight."

"Yeah, yeah." Sonny grinned at her as she quickly ran out of the house, feeling a lot better about the visit now. Maybe it wouldn't be as bad as she thought it would, maybe he had changed, and maybe Sonny had grown up a little so there won't be that many arguments – not like there usually was anyway.

She smiled to herself as she walked down the road, mum would be happy about it all.

"Mum?"

"Sonny?"

"Who else would it be?" She smiled at her and kissed her gently on the cheek before walking to her bedroom to pack a suitcase.

"You're in a better mood." Connie raised an eyebrow at her daughter, following her into the bedroom,

"I know, I had a discussion about everything with Tawni, she helped a lot."

"That's good, so you're okay with going now?"

"Yeah I guess, it can't be that bad. Can it?" She wrinkled her nose, thinking of the worst for a moment, but then she shook her head, it would be okay, they both had a long time to grow up a little more than the last time she spent time with him.

"No, of course it won't be bad, you're going to have a good time."

"I hope so." Sonny carried on packing clothes as her mum walked up behind her,

"How long do you think you're going for?" She laughed at her daughter, as she picked up a black and red T-shirt from her open suitcase.

"I don't know where he is going to take me or anything do I? I need clothes for every possible occasion." She grin at her, as she kissed her lightly on the cheek,

"Whatever you say darling." Sonny nodded and then carried on packing, turning around to look at her when she was done, laughing when Connie just shook her head.

"Finally." She rolls her eyes as she walks out of her room, Sonny laughed at her mum as she walked out behind her.

"Your father will be here soon."

"Cool." Sonny said, sitting down on the settee as Connie started to make coffee,

"Do you still love him?"

"I don't think I do," She set down the mug in front of her and looked as though she was thinking for a moment,

"I used to love him more than anything, but I guess as time goes on I started to realize just how unhappy we both were together."

"It wouldn't have worked out then? No matter what you did?"

"I don't think so, it just would have got a lot worse." Sonny paused for a moment, trying to think of more questions, she always had so many, just never had a good enough reason to ask them.

"Why did you get full custody mum?" Sonny looked at Connie, to see her face, she had never really asked it before, but had always wondered why her dad didn't get any custody rights at all.

"He wanted to do stuff... that didn't include children.."

"Like?"

"Travelling for one, he wanted to work a lot. Social Services didn't think he would be capable of looking after you much because he was out a lot, drinking and working all the time. He has changed now though, a lot. As you know, he is married with a child... he's finally settled down, so it's time you started spending time with him."

"Oh... that's something then." Sonny smiled at Connie, turning back to look at the door, tears glazed her huge, brown eyes as she thought about it. Her own father wasn't capable of looking after his own daughter, he had left them behind because Sonny had been too much of a burden to him. She was the thing holding him back from doing everything he wanted to do, and he had given them both up in a second – only for ten years later to be completely settled down, with a whole new wife and daughter to keep him company.

She sighed as she held back the tears threatening to fall from her eyes. She wouldn't let him make her cry again, she had given up on her dad ages ago. She wasn't about to start letting him make her feel like this all over again.

It wasn't long until he picked her up, thankfully on his own, she hadn't even met the wife but she wasn't sure about her yet. She seemed decent enough, but still. She listened as her dad told her how he had moved house. He talked non stop about his travelling and everything he had done. Sonny was glad for the conversation, she didn't really have much to tell on her part. But she was glad that her dad seemed a lot happier than the last time she seen him, he looked better as well. She smiled and nodded when it seemed appropriate, and laughed when he did. All the while looking around at the new life her dad ha made for himself, the life she wanted when she was older. She sighed, now that he had got everything he wanted, surely he could start acting like a real dad to her soon, surely she was somewhere on his list of things to do.

That evening they all sat around the table, dad, Emma (his wonderful replacement wife) and their nine year old daughter, Cassie.

"So, how do you find school Allison?"

"It's okay, it's a lot easier than I ever thought it would be. I am only on a C average at the moment, but Zora wants to get it up to a B."

"You're having help?" Her dad looked up at his daughter, gulping down his food as Sonny nodded,

"Not loads of help, just having small study sessions at Tawni's or during breaks in rehearsal. And sometimes Chad's house." Sonny smiled at her dad, and then looked at Cassie as she spoke,

"Who is Zane? And Tawni?" Sonny looked at her and then back down at her food.

"Tawni is one of my best friends and Chad is my boyfriend..." Her dad looks shocked when she says this, making Sonny frown at his surprise,

"I don't look that bad do I?" She muttered to herself,

"How long have you been dating?" Cassie carries on, distracting Sonny from her dad for a second.

"Just over a year, he is amazing." Sonny smiled widely as she thought about him. He was the best thing that had ever happened to Sonny, he got on with her mum, he kind of got on with her friend and Chad Dylan Cooper was amazing in general.

"Wow. Long time then. Do you have a photograph?" Dad finally said, Sonny nod at him as she dug into her Jean pockets, pulling out a small photograph of the both of them at the beach.

"You go out with Chad Dylan Cooper?" Cassie grabbed the photograph off Sonny and looked at it, a look of shock on her face. Sonny's dad looked at the photograph as well, his mouth almost dropping in shock as he looked from his wife to Sonny.

"He is a good actor." Emma said, nodding her head as she smiled at Sonny,

"Yeah, he is amazing. We met on set on my first day at So Random, and I guess we hit it off right away."

"Look I am really sorry about this but we have to go." Sonny looked up at them both for a moment, was it something she had said?

"Why?" She muttered,

"We have a prior engagement we couldn't get out of to get to, I am really sorry but it's important." She nodded at them as they both got up to leave,

"Sure. I will clean all this up."

"Thank you so much darling. We will only be a few hours. Love you." She watched as he ran after Emma, smiling at Cassie as she got up,

"I am going for a swim," Cassie got up off the table, Sonny grinned and nodded at her, starting to pick up all the plates,

"Do you want to come?"

"No, I will just do the dishes and then probably go to bed."

"Oh okay then, see you later." She sighed, walking over to the kitchen. She looked around quickly, noticing the bottle of wine on the counter. Setting the plates down, she took one more look around. Who would notice anyway?

She picked up the bottle and smiled to herself, it's just a little something, just to take away all of the pain and loneliness. It couldn't do any harm, could it?

Sonny gulped down the warm liquid, burning the back of her throat after the first taste, but then it felt fine. She smiled to herself as she drunk some more.

It was exactly what she wanted, she wanted to feel nothing. She wanted to be free from all the pain that she felt for the first time. The alcohol has given her everything she had wanted.


	4. Dumped

Sonny slammed the door behind her as she stormed into her bedroom, not paying any attention to her mum calling her name and banging on her door. She wiped away the tears that fell down her face as she ran to her CD player, putting the volume on full blast.

She lay down on her bed and closed her eyes, how could he break up with her? She hated him so much, just when she was happy, and now everything is ruined. She turned around and screamed into her pillow, she hated him so much, she couldn't believe he would do this to her... she thought they were happy. But he likes someone else, someone better, she knows it. She scoffed at his pathetic excuse for breaking up with her, she was too rebellious for him. She sighed, she will show him, she will show everyone exactly what rebellion is.

She sits up and looks around her room for her mobile, it was time she learned how to grow up anyway and stopped hanging around with those losers, that's what April called them. It was time she moved on from them, wasn't it?

She sighed to herself, they were her best friends, but she can't be around them anymore. It's suffocating, she needs time, time to think and time to just breathe.

She smiles when she finds the person she was looking for, her hand starts to shake as she presses the call button. This was for the best, she told herself, she had to do it.

"Hello? April?"

"Munroe? Hey! What is it?"

"I was wondering if you could come over? I was a bit bored and I have nothing else to do.."

"Yeah sure, where 'bouts do you live?" Sonny closed her eyes as she told her the address and smiles when she says she will be right over. When she hang up she ran around her room, cleaning it up and hiding the bears and dolls she had kept from my younger years.

She jumps when her phone goes off, _'I am outside. April.' _Sonny nods, and slowly walks out of her bedroom, not even looking at her mum, running to the door, trying to ignore her questions about what's wrong with her. She didn't have time for her anymore, she loved Chad, how could she tell her that precious Chad Dylan Cooper had broken her heart? There was no chance in hell.

Sonny grinned at April when she opened the door and grabbed her hand to pull her into the house, she was dressed in her usual all black, with her eyeliner carved deeply into her skin. Her face pale, her hair long and black, and the choice of clothing, she looked exactly like the type of person Sonny knew her mum would not want her to be hanging around with. She nods at her mum as they both walk past her and straight to her bedroom, almost laughing at the look on her face.

"I didn't say you could have friends around." Sonny rolls her eyes at her emphasis on the words friends,

"Yeah well, whatever." She muttered, grabbing April's hand and pulling her into her bedroom, slamming the door behind them and locking the door. She shook her head and rolled her eyes when she looked at Sonny,

"Mothers." Sonny laughed and then lay down on her bed, April quickly follows after turning the music up a little. Sonny watched as she pulls something out from her pocket,

"Want some?"

"What is it?" She shrugs gently and then looks at Sonny,

"Pot."

"Sure, I guess." She gulped nervously,

"It's good, it makes you forget everything, feel nothing.." Sonny nodded again and then took some from her, watching as April lit it before putting it in her mouth.

"Don't inhale deeply, see if you can have better luck with this." Sonny laughed at her as she remembered the cigarette from before. She gently inhaled the fumes, grinning to herself as she felt.. nothing.

Sonny watched as April brought it to her own mouth, both of them giggling, feeling so free and so happy for once, feeling like nothing matters anymore. It felt so good as Sonny just lay there with April, smoking something she had once promised herself she would never do. It all felt so right, like this was meant to be...


	5. Change

Sonny grinned at April when she saw her at the studios the next day in her usual hang out spot when they weren't filming – the place she would now be hanging out, to the horror of her fellow cast members. She grabs a cigarette from April as she walks over to her,

"You look amazing." April grins, Sonny looks down at her clothes, smiling. She liked the new her, she looked kind of cool. She was wearing skinny black jeans, a red and black top, she had copied April's eyeliner and other make-up last night when April had spent the night at hers.

Sonny groaned and rolled her eyes when she saw Chad,

"Oh look the twat that broke up with you." Sonny sighed, turning the other way so she wouldn't even have to look at the boy she still loved – although she wasn't going to admit that to anyone any time soon.

"His loss though, right?" April grins,

"You're right there." Sonny inhaled the smoke as she pulled the cigarette to her mouth, her eyes being drawn to Chad once more, she watched as he talked about her – it was so obvious, he didn't even try to hide it. She looked at April, tutting loudly before stamping out her cigarette as Marshall walked towards them,

"Come on, rehearsal." She mutters, walking off, ignoring the stares from Tawni and everyone else on 'So Random!'. She spent the whole of the rehearsal ignoring every sly comment coming from Tawni, and every look from Nico and Grady. She sighed, she knew this was to be expected.

~ .. ~

Sonny groaned as she looked at her watch, waiting for her mother outside of the studios. It was a parents evening for the school side of Hollywood, a lecture she had not been looking forward to. She had been doing well in school for a while, and now she was back into her whole routine of failing all over again.

She kicked a rock, knowing that it would be grounded to her bedroom to study time again, she wondered why her mother couldn't see that she wasn't capable of getting over a C average? She had never been able to – not for long anyway – and she never would be able to, she should just accept that.

"Let's just hope you get good results to make up for your behaviour at home." Her mother says as she approaches Sonny, shaking her head when Sonny just rolled her eyes and folded her arms.

"Whatever." She muttered, carrying on walking down the hall, really wishing she didn't have to do this right now. She smiled a little, who cared if she grounded her anyway? There was always the bedroom window. Sonny would always win.

She leaves her mum's side as they walk into the main hall, practically running over to April and Simon – a guest on 'McKenzie Falls' and also a good friend of April. She grins at Simon, glad that Chad was in the room. Simon was the supplier for everyone's drugs, he was a bit older than Sonny but that was what made him a lot more appealing than anyone else in the room.

Sonny made sure she giggled loudly when Simon put his arm around her shoulders, slyly slipping April something, who winked as she stuffed it down her bra. Sonny grinned, laughing at her, brushing off the looks she was getting from Chad and Tawni.

~ .. ~

Chad stared at Sonny, he had no idea what had gotten into her recently. She had completely ditched her friends at 'So Random!', and it had all happened as soon as he had dumped her. He sighed, maybe this was her way of dealing with having her heart broken, maybe she would snap out of it soon and realize who her real friends are after a while... he could only hope that would happen.

"Who is that guy?" Chad looked over at Sonny's mum, who stopped her conversation with Marshall to look over at Sonny, he looked back to Tawni and sighed,

"His name is Simon, he is rumoured to be the local drug dealer for all us Hollywood stars."

"How old is he?"

"Twenty four... Sonny wouldn't be doing drugs though, would she? I don't think she would even think about it..."

"Yeah well Chad, that was the old Sonny, this Sonny.. I have no idea what is going through her mind at the moment. I guess we should have seen this coming after what you did to her." She sighed,

"I just wish she would talk to us."

"And me." Chad muttered, knowing the look on Tawni's face was a 'Why should she, you broke her heart.' He looked down at the floor, refusing to let tears fall down his face because he – Chad Dylan Cooper – did not cry, not in front of people.

"I don't know why she is hanging around with April. There is only one word to describe her, and that is trouble." Zora whispered, Tawni nodded knowing the girl was right, Sonny was only going to get in trouble when she was hanging around them and she had a feeling that Sonny was already in too deep. She was way out of her depth right now and nobody, not even herself knows what to do about it.

~ .. ~

"They are staring at you." April laughs, wrinkling her nose, Sonny just nods and looks over at them across the room,

"Let them, I don't care." She shrugs them off and then looks at Simon,

"I bet Chad is talking about you." He nods, laughing for a moment before returning to that solemn glance he kept throughout any conversation anyone had with him. Sonny laughed and then looked back over at her previous friends, they annoyed her so much. And she had no idea what Chad or Tawni had said to her, but her mum looked pissed off. She was ready to kill Sonny and she hadn't even spoken to Miss Bitterman yet. Sonny sighs, muttering a goodbye when she is called over by Marshall.

"If she grounds me or something, I will be a little late. But I will be there." She winks at them before walking ahead, dreading the whole evening. She nods once at Tawni, not nodding or anything and then looks at her mother.

"What?"

"We have to see your teacher now, move it."

"I was having a conversation."

"I do not care Allison Munroe." Sonny rolled her eyes, oh she was so annoyed. She stifled a laugh at the sight of her mum's bright red face, if they were in a cartoon right now, there would be steam coming out of her ears. She closes her eyes to picture the imagine, doing her best to hold back the laughter.

"Now move it." She frowns at her daughter who turned to Chad,

"What did you say to her?"

"Nothing Sonny, don't be so paranoid."

"Paranoid? You obviously said something, so tell me what lies you have been spreading now." Sonny clenched her shaking fists, glaring at the boy in front of her,

"Nothing. I just told her the truth, that Simon and April are trouble."

"What? So I can't have other friends now? Maybe.. just maybe, I don't want to be stuck hanging around with a bunch of losers for the rest of my life. So how about you stop informing my mother of everything and get your own sad, pathetic little life. I really don't care any more Chad. But do not try and turn my mother against me or my friends again." Sonny grinned evilly at his face, turning away quickly, ignoring the looks she was getting from Marshall. She heard April laugh loudly, and she grinned to herself, that had felt so good... the look on Chad's face was priceless.

~ .. ~

"How could you?"

"Oh get over it mother, because you were so perfect in school."

"I never said I was Allison."

"I don't care about school, it's like a prison in there. Now just leave me alone." Sonny pushed past her to storm into her bedroom, slamming the door behind her and turning her music up as loud as it would go. It was a routine they had both been getting used to lately.

She ran to the mirror, staring at herself angrily, she hated her mother so much. What gave her the right to lecture her on all her grades when she is working in a dead end job with never a hope in hell of a promotion? How dare she.

She shook her head, looking around her bedroom before grabbing the scissors on her desk. She smiles to herself as she thinks about how much she just needs to grow up, and how much she needs to change. She nods, taking a deep breath as she closes her eyes – trying to think about what she is about to do.

It would look so much better... so much nicer. She nods, grinning at her reflection when she opens her eyes, taking the scissors to her long, brown hair. She watches as the pieces fall down, not letting the tears fall down her face.

She has to do this. She wants to change. She has to change, she knows that.

When she is done she looks in the mirror, nodding in approval at her new hairstyle. It doesn't look too bad, not as bad as she thought it would. She smiled and then looks around for something to clean up the hair on the floor, before escaping out of her bedroom window to meet April.

Her eyes settle on a towel, placing all the hair in it. Taking one last look in the mirror before quietly opening the window and sneaking out. She grins to herself as her feet hit the ground, breathing in the fresh air.

She had changed, and they would just have to get used to it.


	6. Where?

Sonny laughed loudly as she stood outside the studios with April and her friends. She was becoming part of their group now, it had been two whole weeks since the whole thing had started and if she was honest, she was enjoying herself most of the time.

She puffed on the cigarette in her hand and then rolled her eyes when Tawni and Zora started to approach them. She hated to admit it but she missed them all so much but of course, she wouldn't let anyone else know that – not even them. They were her best friends and she had just ditched them, she felt bad but she knew they were better off without her holding them back. It was better like this, better for everyone. She would just ruin everything for them – Sonny was like that, or so she thought, she ruined everything she touched. She hated herself for letting herself get close to them, she didn't deserve their friendship, she never had and she never will.

"Sonny! You missed school today, I copied down some notes for you." Tawni held out a small pink notebook, pleading with Sonny to just take it, Sonny just looked unsure and stared at April for a moment but she just laughed and turned away from the three girls. Sonny took one more look at her and then back towards Tawni and Zora,

"Whatever, screw school and screw you, freaks." She made sure her words were filled with so much venom, as much as she could find within herself just so they would leave her alone. She was trouble, that was all she was. Sonny was turning into the type of person that parents warned their own children against hanging around with, she just wanted them two to be safe – and sometimes, the only way to make sure they were okay was to make them give up on her completely. She didn't feel like bringing them down with her, it wasn't fair on two such amazing people. She sighs as their faces drop, walking away quietly.

"Yes! Walk away losers." April shouted behind them, grinning,

"Don't rub it in." Sonny muttered, watching April as she lit another cigarette. Sonny stood there and watched as Tawni and Zora walked away, she had everything before and now she had... nothing. She had the one thing she had wanted – she didn't feel anything, no pain and no sadness. Just like she wanted it.

"Hey Sonny, want to get out of this place?" April asks as Sonny went to walk back to rehearsal, she nodded slowly not really sure if she would be able to turn down the girl.

"We have to run then." April whispers, winking at Sonny before taking off,

"Oh God." Sonny mutters mostly to herself before running to catch up with April.

"Simon is meeting us at the gates, you know if we are spotted you will get a phone call home?" Sonny just shrugged,

"Nobody is home anyway." April nodded, laughing, not really caring if they phoned her parents as she looked around.

"Just walk until I tell you to run, got it?" Sonny grinned, loving the rush she got when she was going against all the rules that had been set for her so long ago. The excitement had been something she had always yearned to feel for as long as she could remember and for a while 'So Random!', gave her that but then it ended for her.

"RUN!" Sonny laughed as they both spotted Marshall walking towards them, April managed to get there before Sonny and jumped over the tiny, pointless studio gate. Sonny soon followed, a wide grin on her face when she saw Simon with more drugs probably..

Everything was all a blur for Sonny after that, she had never felt so good but so bad at the same time. They ran from school – with Simon – and ended up in town. April started to steal stuff from shops, which Sonny took the hint and started to copy her. They grabbed a load, ignoring the looks from the other customers as they did so.

It wasn't long until they were caught, Sonny remembered running faster than she had ever run in her life, ending up in Sonny's house. The small bits between had faded into one misty memory.

They all giggled loudly as Sonny and Simon collapsed on the floor, both breathing heavily as April sat on the bed, lighting her fourth batch of pot.

"Don't be so selfish." Sonny moaned, lifting her hand up and giggling when April handed her some, taking no time in lighting it with the help of Simon. She watched him as he moved to one side, watching Sonny's every move intently.

"I will be right back, don't do anything I wouldn't do." April winked at them both before walking out of the bedroom, Sonny just shook her head and then stared at Simon, who was still laying next to her with his hand on his head, laying to one side. She didn't think anything of it when he leaned in to kiss her on the lips, she let's him, not even thinking properly. Since hanging around with April she had kissed a lot of guys, and done more. It was no longer a big deal for Sonny. She laughed loudly when he lay on top of her and he grinned,

"You're very beautiful." He whispers, Sonny blushed and looked away, not seeing him pull something out of his pocket.

"Try some of this. It's a lot better... it's exactly what you want.. it makes you forget everything, I promise." Sonny looked at the small packet in his hands containing white powder, she nodded slowly as she took it from him. He smiles again, lifting up her chin to kiss her on the lips again.

"How much do you want for it?" Sonny asked as they both pulled away for a second,

"This is enough." He looked down at her and then gestured to their position, she grinned and kissed him full on. She could hear the door opening but she didn't bother looking up, she doesn't care anymore. She could feel his hand crawling up her stomach but she didn't think anything of it. She closes her eyes for a moment, remembering a time when she would be shaking with discomfort, a time when she would be nervous about this – even with Chad, the person she loved. She had no idea what was happening to her, she didn't know anything anymore. She would look in the mirror sometimes and not even recognise the mirror image looking back at her... she doesn't know who she is, who she is becoming.. she doesn't think anyone does anymore. Where was the old Sonny gone?


	7. Running

"Sonny eat your tea," Connie looked at her daughter, with a stern look on her face as she usually did these days. Sonny just laughed at her dismissively, watching as she just shook her head at the shadow of her daughter.

Sonny looks down at the food, pushing her plate away as she gets up out of her seat and heads for her bedroom.

"April is coming over in a minute, I ain't hungry anyway." She mutters, not looking her mum in the eyes as she speaks,

"Sit down and eat your tea now!" Connie turned around, anger flaring in her eyes,

"Whatever Connie." Sonny grinned at the look at the hurt and surprise on her face when she says her name,

"Connie?"

"Yes that is your name, isn't it?" She raises one eyebrow, and smirks, folding her arms over her chest. She nods slowly and then looks down at her tea,

"I am your mum, Sonny," She whispers,

"Whatever." Sonny heaves a deep sigh, running over to the door when it knocked, grinning at the person on the other side when she winked.

"Hey Connie!" Sonny hid her laugh as she carries on walking to her bedroom, April just runs ahead of her giggling all the way,

"Got anything on you?" Sonny whispers as she shuts the door behind her, she grins and nods as she pulls out a packet of white powder, just like the one Simon had given Sonny the other night, she nod at her, remembering the feeling it gave her before, the total freedom and the painless world it allowed her to become part of.

Sonny grins as she hands her some, watching her as she separates all the lines before she 'snorts' it up. Soon enough, she copies her, and they are both laying on the floor giggling like little children. Sonny looks up at the ceiling, watching the shapes and colours dance around, each one making her giggle out loud, distracting her from the banging door outside, the shouts coming from her angry and upset mum, blanking out everything to do with it all. She doesn't really notice her until she grabs her arm, yanking Sonny out from the world she had found herself in for a few minutes. She shakes her head at April, tutting, trying to ignore the woman she used to be so close to.

"What?"

"It stinks in here."

"Get out then."

"I want you gone!" Connie looked at April and the pointed towards the door, glaring at the girl as she walked out,

"Whatever you say Connie." She salutes her, making Sonny giggle,

"How dare you chuck my friend out?" She shouted, pulling her off her arm, and stepping back, only then noticing the packet she holds in her clenched fist. She clenches her own for a moment, and turns around quickly to hide the hot, burning tears running down her face.

"What do you want from me?"

"Are you on drugs Sonny? Are you high right now?" She grabs her shoulder -hard - pulling Sonny around, towards her so she can look her daughter in the face and know if there is anything left of the girl from Wisconsin. Sonny sighs as she admits defeat,

"Whatever, Connie." She hisses out her name, frowning as she does so,

"You have caught me. You can't do anything to me anyway. I don't care."

"You're grounded."

'Whatever you stupid cow. I have a window you know, what you going to do, seal it up? Bar me in here? Lock me away until I am good old Sonny again?" She looks at Sonny, like she doesn't even know who she was anymore. But Sonny rolls her eyes, she doesn't even know who she is anymore, so she can't exactly expect anyone else to know.

"Now get out of my bedroom!"

"Sonny, let's talk about this." Connie pleaded, tears running down her face,

"I don't want to talk, I don't need to talk, just get out and leave me alone." Sonny screams as loud as she can, pushing her as hard as she can out through her door, slamming it in her confused face. She kicks a beer can away from her and watches as it rolls under her bed. When did it all get so hard? When did it become like this?

She sighs loudly and takes one last look at herself in the mirror before jumping out of her window, grinning to herself. Nobody rules her, she doesn't care about them anymore. She can do what she wants, when she wants.

And as soon as her feet hit the ground, she does the one thing she has always down... she runs. She runs as fast as she can, not turning back to look at that house she calls home, not looking back to her mum, not turning back to the old Sonny.

And for what? To get a fix....

**A/N: Please, please, please review. It would mean so much, hey, a review for a review? ;) **

**Review mine and I will review yours.. yes I have resorted to bribing now as cyber cookies don't seem to work well. **

**I would like to thank Sonny_At_Twilight for being the only one to review last time :) It means a lot, have a cookie! =D**


	8. Blank

Sonny crawls out of bed, not really seeing, hearing, smelling anything. She can't feel her surroundings, it's all one big white blue, one huge mess. This is not the feeling she had been longing for. She could feel something right now, she wanted to be pain free but this was the opposite.

She clutches her stomach pain, gritting her teeth as she tries her best to hold back the scream she can feel building up. She closes her eyes for a moment, trying to focus on something, anything but the pain sears through her body, causing her to fall to the ground. She cries out in pain, she thinks, and slowly starts getting up. Blinded by a white light, she covers her eyes with her shaking hand, never seeing... never realizing.

Grabbing her phone, she dials the first number she thinks of. Not really knowing if she would run to her aid, does she even care if she won't come? Maybe Sonny wants all of this to end... maybe this was the way things were meant to be.

"Hello? Sonny? Is that you?" She can hear the worry in her voice already and she lightly shakes her head, not wanting to make anything spin even more than it already is,

"Tawni..." She word comes out, stuttering, full of all the pain she can feel.

"What's wrong?" She can hear voices in the background, Grady and Nico. She sighs as she closes her eyes,

"Help me." She whispers, her voice cracking as tears fall down her face.

"Are you at home?" Sonny stutters a yes as she drops her phone and lays her head down on the cold floor of the bathroom.

"Sonny? Wake up!" She can hear Tawni, she can hear her crying, she can hear Grady and Nico shouting. Are they angry with her? What did she do wrong? She shakes her head for a moment, opening her eyes slowly, looking at the three faces above her.

"God.. she is so pale, what do we do?" Her eyes flash over to Grady as he speaks, Tawni grabs her hand, trying to smile but the tears that are falling from her face give away the situation,

"She is freezing." She whispers, Sonny is confused though.. she doesn't feel cold, she is boiling. She needs to cool down, she is so hot. She looks away from them and then sees Nico,

"What have you taken?" He mutters,

"Nothing..." She mutters,

"Tell me now." She can hear Grady get up and walk over to her bedroom, looking for whatever she had taken probably.

"Dunno." She closes her eyes, she is so tired, she wants to sleep.

"Guys!" She can hear Grady, he is closer now but she doesn't open her eyes, it hurts too much. She listens as Nico tuts and heaves a deep sigh,

"Cocaine? Seriously Sonny?" He sounds so angry, so disappointed,

"Sorry..." She whispers,

"What else?"

"Pot." She squeezes her eyes shut, tight, never wanting to open them ever again. She tells herself over and over again to not let them open, this was her time, it was time to die. She was supposed to leave this way, please, she begs with herself, just let me go.

She listens to the ambulance in the background, Tawni is crying, Grady is whispering something to her about how much they miss the old her, how they want her to get better. Nico is just shouting at her, and then the door knocks and then... nothing.

Everything is blank, there is no life flashing before her eyes, blank... there is a huge white canvas surrounding her, suffocating her, there is no way out of this.. there is no exit.

She keeps her eyes closed and waits for everything to disappear. She waits for death to come and take her into it's arms but all she feels is nothing, she can't see nothing but she doesn't feel dead.. not yet.

**A/N: Please review :( **


	9. I Woke Up

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Eight ~ **

~ Sonny ~

I woke up, I actually woke up.

I opened my eyes only to quickly close them again.

I thought I was dead, just for a moment, I thought everything had ended. But I am alive. Still.

Alive.. using the term lightly, I don't **feel** alive, I feel like I should have died. And some unknown force had prevented me from dying, it had stopped me from doing what I had wanted more than anything else in this world.

I keep my eyes closed in the hope I won't have to open them again. Now everyone knows what I am doing, what I have done, and they are all going to hate me. I sigh, slowly opening my eyes again. I look around the clean, white room, pure white just like the blank canvas I was wrapped in when I thought I was going to die. Maybe it was just hope, maybe I never really was dying. Maybe..

I look around the room once more, smiling to myself when I see nobody is here. Nobody cares, it's okay. Nobody wants to know about the druggie, I brought all of this on myself, I don't deserve help. Nobody cares and that's the way I want it.

~ Connie ~

I look at my fragile daughter as she just lays there in the bed, sleeping restlessly. What happened to my little baby girl? Why was she doing this to herself? _She came to Hollywood, that's why. _I keep telling myself, but not everyone was like this.

I sigh as I turn to walk out of the room, towards her best friends – the ones she has abandoned for this new rebellion route she has taken. These were her real friends, I don't even know the other people, but I do know they don't love her like these do. They aren't the ones she called, they aren't even here.

I sit next to Nico and put my head in my hands,

"Chad broke up with her?" I sigh, trying to understand why he would do that, he tried so hard, when he was over my house he would look at her and I could just see how much he loved her, why would he break up with her?

"Yeah, she was really upset.. that's when all of this started kind of."

"Kind of?"

"Well.. she started smoking and talking with April before, but the thing with Chad just sent her off the edge." Tawni explained, looking down at the floor as tears fell down her face.

"I don't know how this happened... one day she was just Sonny... she was happy and the next day she is slamming doors, shouting at me..." I look at the door to her room, wondering if she is awake yet.

"I am going to check on her." I mutter under my breath after a few minutes of silence, they all nod as I walk into her room. Smiling when I see her eyes open, she just nods at me and turns away, I miss my baby girl, where has she gone in all this chaos?

"What happened?"

"I don't know, why don't you tell me?" Her voice drips with sarcasm, and I sit in the end of her bed,

"You took an overdose, I want to... no.. I need to know why." I reach out to touch her hand but she pulls it away from me, refusing to even look at me. I look down at my hands and wait for her answer,

"I didn't do it on purpose, okay?" She rolls her eyes and stares at the blank wall in front of her,

"Why should I believe you?"

"I don't know, I don't care if you do or if you don't Connie, just leave me alone." I nod and walk out of her room, wondering where the old Sonny ever went to, thinking about what else could have happened to make her do this, was it just curiosity? I approach a doctor on my way out of her room and smile at him, I have to do this, I need to help her.

~ Sonny ~

"Whatever." I sigh and look at my nails, I am really not interested. Connie looks at me but I know she doesn't really care about me, she just wants me to be fixed. I roll my eyes at the psychologist in front of me,

"There is nothing wrong with me."

"You took an overdose, how can you say that?!" Connie shouts at me, I roll my eyes again and look away from her, over to the door,

"You know what doctor? She just doesn't like me doing anything, she doesn't want me to have friends and she doesn't like me to be happy. I am going, I really cannot be bothered with all your crap." I grab my bag next to me and walk out of there as fast as I can, ignoring Connie's calls behind me.

They can't help me, the psychologist had admitted that much when I first came here a week ago. She told me that unless I wanted help then nothing was going to work, well guess what? Not only do I not want help, but I don't need it. I will never need it.


	10. Sixteen Days

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Nine ~ **

"Yeah I will grab something now, hang on, lemme look." Sonny looked behind her to make sure her mum isn't looking or listening as she walks into the bathroom and looks in the medicine cabinet.

"Here we are! These should work." She giggles,

"Yeah, I will be there soon, speak then." She hung up and turned around, pills in hand as she grins to herself at the thought of them being able to get her and her friends high.

"What are you doing?" Connie grabbed her daughters arm as she tried to walk out of the bathroom, just shaking her head,

"Nothing, now get off me." She muttered, pulling away from her and trying to walk past the angry woman. But before she knew it her mother grabbed the pills and pinned her up against the wall behind her, she cries out in pain but Connie ignores her, and Sonny can just see the anger in her eyes.. the hate.

"Get off me!" She screams, ignoring the tears falling down her pale face as she grits her teeth and tries to get away from him,

"You're not going anywhere, especially not with them." She points towards the pills that were now scattered all over the floor and Sonny started to cry again, forcing the woman off her,

"Please let me go." She can feel her own anger rushing through her,

"Just leave me alone!" She screeches, pushing her mother as hard as she can and running out of the door.

~ .. ~

"Hey! Got anything for me baby?" Sonny grinned as she ran up to Simon, red eyed and shaking, watching as he reached into his pockets as he leaned in to kiss her on the lips.

"I will be paying you in cash today." Sonny whispers, handing him some money, ignoring the disappointment on his face when he counts it, giving her a lot in return. Sonny nods and runs back over to April, without even saying goodbye.

She felt numb, she couldn't feel anything. But she knew she was scared, so scared. She just wanted it to be like it was before but it was too late now and nothing could ever be the same again, she would never be the same person. And as much as she wishes she could be, she knew it was impossible.

Sonny sighed as she walked,

"I don't want to go back home for a while." She says to her,

"You can stay with me." April beamed as Sonny thought about Tawni and the amazing sleepovers they used to have. It would never be like that with April, it wasn't that type of friendship.

Sonny didn't go home for another sixteen days.

~ Sonny ~

My pale face, tires eyes, shaking hands and sudden weight loss immediately gave away where I had been and who I had been with.

Connie just shook her head at me when I finally got the courage to walk into the house.

I crawled into my bedroom, immediately lighting some pot and smoking it before my eyes closed and I fell asleep.


	11. Suspended

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything other than the storyline**

**~ Chapter Ten ~ **

Mrs Bitterman looked over at Sonny as she carved her name into her desk and sighed,

"Miss Munroe, could you tell me one simile in this poem please?" Sonny sighed when she heard someone call her name again but she didn't care, she was too tired to care.

"Miss Munroe?" She looked up finally and shrugged before looking back down when she saw the teacher,

"Did you hear me?"

"Yes."

"Well?" Sonny groaned and then looked as all her friends stared at her, shaking her head and closing her eyes for a moment, trying to think of that damn question. She opened them again and looked at Tawni for a second before grabbing her bag,

"Whatever! This is just a load of crap anyway, I don't care about you or your stupid poems." Sonny shouted as loud as she could, walking out of the room and slamming it behind her.

~ .. ~

"I am sorry Connie but we have no other choice."

"You can't suspend her from the studios though, she won't do it again will you Sonny?" Connie looked over at her daughter, sighing when she was just sitting there with her arms crossed over her chest, looking out of the window.

"She will Connie, I have given her so many warnings. How about this... get her sorted out? I need the old Sonny Munroe back, we all miss her so much. I have a few rehab camp leaflets for you and I know it's not my place to say but I know that Sonny is an amazing girl and so do you. I am willing to give her a second chance when I know she is okay again, she has just lost her way. Think of this as a way of helping her, okay?" Connie nodded, knowing Marshall was right,

"Thank you." She said, taking the leaflets from his extended hand and sighing as she touched Sonny's shoulder lightly, wondering how she could help her daughter.

~ .. ~

Sonny rolled her eyes at her mother when she was sent to her bedroom, she thought she would have known better than that by now. She saw the leaflets in her pockets, she wouldn't dare to send Sonny to one of them, he hadn't said anything about them though so Sonny hoped she was right.

Sonny sighs as she sits down on her bed, wondering where April is right now. She sits there, just thinking for a moment before grabbing her purse and jumping out of the window.

She ran as fast as she could to April's house, grinning when she saw he open the door,

"I am so glad that you're here, there is this big party tonight." Sonny smiled and then followed her into the house, grabbing a cigarette from her on the way.


	12. Finding Her

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Eleven ~ **

"What do you want blondie?" Chad looked at the four people in front of him and sighed. He had noticed the change in Sonny lately and he noticed that as usual, she wasn't with them.

"Sonny is in trouble, we need your help."

"Trouble?" Nico nodded and then looked over at Grady,

"There is this massive party tonight but the thing is the police know about it and about halfway through the party they are raiding the place. We don't want to warn everyone, just Sonny, we need to get her out of there before the police go."

"Why do the police care about some stupid teenage party?" Chad rolled his eyes,

"Drugs." Zora replied simply, Chad looked away for a moment trying to picture the recent Sonny in his head, trying to put it all together. Sonny was going to a party that would be full of drugs, Sonny... his Sonny... He looked back at them and shook his head, his eyes widening as he realized what was going on,

"She's not...."He trailed off and looked at the wall behind them,

"She is Chad and we are worried, please, just for this once can you think of someone other than yourself?"

"Why do you need my help?"

"You're the only one with a car." Tawni shrugged,

"We need to leave now." She sighed, grabbing Chad's hand and dragged him to his own car.

"Sonny's mum called us earlier, she told us she ran away after trying to steal some pills, then Zora heard some guys talking about the big raid at April's house tonight. Zora put two and two together after Sonny didn't turn up to rehearsal today. Her mum said she always runs to April and Simon." Chad nodded slowly, starting the car as he tried to hold back his tears,

"Is it all my fault?" He whispered, refusing to look at their faces, he already knew the answer.

"I think... I think that you sent her of the edge to be honest." Tawni looked out of the window,

"I didn't mean to but everything was becoming too much. She was smoking and hanging around with April – I thought she was doing it to live up to the Hollywood bad boy thing I have going on. I couldn't handle knowing I had changed her, I thought if we broke up then she would stop."

"I don't know why she started doing it in the first place, but there was something wrong Chad, you should have seen that." Nico muttered, Chad nodded knowing that he should have known something was wrong, he should have seen any pain she was in and he should have asked her about it. He never should have jumped to the conclusion that it was because she wanted to live up to what she thought was his expectations. He shouldn't have thought her small rebellion was too much for him to handle, he could have helped her, he could have stopped all of it.

He wiped a tear that fell down his face before anyone could notice it. He still loved her so much, he loved her too much he guessed. He didn't want to see her hurt, he didn't want her to be in pain. But he knew he had only made things worse through his own selfishness.

It was dark by the time they pulled up and the party was in full motion. Chad groaned when he opened the door door and looked at the amount of people there,

"How in the hell are we supposed to find her?!" He moaned while following Tawni and everyone else into the crowded house, staying behind then closely.

"APRIL!" Chad looked at Tawni in surprise when he heard her shout and he shook his head trying his best to focus on the situation at hand. He could see April walking towards them – drunk and smoking something. He looked away for a moment, trying to spot Sonny.

"Where is Sonny?"

"I don't know." April shrugged and looked behind her at Simon, Chad frowned and then bit down on his lip when Tawni clenched her fist before slamming April against a wall. Chad blinked in shock, he had known Tawni was Sonny's best friend before all of this but he had no idea that Tawni could get so angry.

"She is upstairs, jeez people, relax... live a little." Tawni slammed her back once more before running up the stairs.

Chad gasped and looked away when they entered one bedroom, Sonny was in there with a black haired guy, half naked and snorting coke. There she was in just her bra and knickers and him with just his bottoms on. He shook his head and bit down on his lip to stop himself from crying. She looked terrible, she looked as though anything or anyone could break her any minute. He didn't even want to know what they had been doing before they had come in, he wasn't sure he wanted to know.

He felt Nico push past him and grab the guy sitting next to Sonny, punching him hard in the face. Sonny just sat there, not bothering to cover herself up – she was that out of it.

Chad took off his jacket and walked up to her, not looking at Tawni and Grady as he walked past them. He didn't see the tear tracks running down their face,he didn't see the fear in their eyes. He wrapped his jacket around the shaking girl and tried his best to smile at her, trying to hide his own fear. She looked away from him, reaching out a hand to grab the drugs, looking into Chad's eyes when he grabbed her by the wrist and shook his head. He lifted her up with no trouble, glad when she didn't struggle in his arms and instead wrapped her arms around his neck, she didn't kick or scream just like he thought she would. She didn't make a big deal out of leaving.

He smiled at her when he put her into the car, her eyes were glazed over, he wondered if she even knew where she was. He put on her seatbelt and placed a cushion by her head, he sighed loudly and shook his head at Nico before starting the car.

"Lock the doors." Nico whispered, Chad nodded and did as he said, not knowing what Sonny was capable of. He jumped in shock when he heard Sonny scream loudly, he watched the tears falling down her face as she banged on the window, it was like this sudden monster had been released.

She carried on screaming and screaming but they all ignored her, knowing that the police would be at the house very soon. She kicked and shouted, cried and screamed for them to let her out. But Chad just carried on driving to her house, not knowing the horror that was about to come...


	13. Mistakes

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Twelve ~  
**

Sonny sighed and closed her eyes as she just stood there after her shower, Chad and Connie were sitting around the table just talking to each other while Tawni, Nico and Grady were sitting on the sofa.

She tried to think of a way to get out of this, she had to do something to make up for it.

"I am really sorry." Sonny muttered as she sat on her mum's lap,

"I really am." She nuzzled her head in her neck and put her arms around her mums shoulders, she could feel her mum sighing and wrapping her arms around her daughter's waist.

"It won't happen again." Sonny glared at Tawni when she snorted as she walked to the kitchen, slamming the cup she held in her hand down on the counter.

"It's okay, it was just one huge mistake." Grady smiled, Sonny nodded and then looked up at her mum who kissed her gently on the forehead.

"A MISTAKE?" Sonny jumped when she heard a glass smash on the floor, grabbing on tighter to her mum. Connie shook her head at Tawni, and Sonny watched as Tawni started to walk over to her,

"You have been doing this for months now, you're lucky we got you out of there tonight otherwise you're whole career would be ruined and you would be spending a few nights in some grubby prison cell with your druggie best friends!" Sonny shook her head,

"They aren't druggies."

"Whatever Sonny, but you are. Just look at yourself, you're sweating and shaking now and you haven't gone what?" She looked at her watch and tutted,

"One hour, not even one whole hour since your last hit and look at you..." She shook her head in disgust and Sonny slowly got out of her mums lap,

"Whatever Tawni, sorry we can't all be perfect like you."

"I didn't say I was perfect but you... have you even looked at yourself in the mirror lately, you're a mess. I can't even stand to look at you anymore, you make me sick, you've let yourself become like this and you don't even care. You're just another Hollywood actress, a stupid little girl who turned to drugs and alcohol to drown your pathetic problems. You've become a slut." She spat out every single word with so much venom, Sonny could feel herself shaking with anger before walking away from everyone.

"That's it, go away! Run to your secret stash of drugs." Tawni shouted from behind Sonny, she could feel tears stinging her eyes,

"I am not a slut, okay?" She whispered, looking back at her old best friend,

"And that is why we found you practically naked in an empty bedroom with a naked man.. right.. no... you're not a slut." Sonny turned a bright shade of red as she looked at the kitchen counter and grabbed a knife that was laying on the counter, she ignored everyone else as she held it up and pointed it at Tawni,

"Take it back." Her hand shook, her anger only rising when Tawni laughed, Connie screamed and Chad's chair scrapped back on the wooden floor, Grady held Nico back and shook his head,

"You wouldn't dare, you don't have the guts." Tawni looked away from Sonny for a moment and over at Chad, rolling her eyes.

"Put the knife down." Sonny could hear Chad say, she span towards him with the knife pointing towards him and shook her head,

"What are you even doing here Chad? You broke up with **me! **Get the hell out of here! I don't even want you here."

"I love you Sonny, please put the knife down." He tried to reach out but Sonny put the knife to her neck and shook her head, her whole body shaking with rage,

"It's my life, just leave me alone!" She wiped away the tears with one hand and looked over at her mum who was shaking her head and slowly walking towards her daughter.

"Put it down baby."

"Just leave me alone." She whispered, dropping the knife to the floor before running to her bedroom, crying as she leaned against the door. She just wanted to die, why wouldn't anyone just let her die?

She shook her head as she got up and locked the door, looking around her bedroom for something.. anything. She grabbed the scissors she had used so long ago to cut her hair, and then looked into the mirror. Tawni's words rang through her head,

"_Have you even looked in the mirror lately.. you look a mess." _

Sonny nodded in agreement, she did look terrible.

She stumbled into her bed, looking at the scissors for a moment before digging them as deep as she could into her wrist, dragging them to make one line right across her shaking wrist. She smiled at the blood that dripped down her wrist, laying back on her bed as she tried to think about something else, trying to forget about the blood that she could hear dripping onto the ground, making a small puddle of the dark red liquid, surrounding her bed, separating her from everyone else. Separating her from everything she didn't want to hear.

Because sometimes people lie to themselves, just because the truth hurts too much to even think about admitting it to themselves. Tawni had only confirmed her fears, she wasn't Sonny Munroe anymore, she was just a druggie, stupid, horrible whore who didn't deserve to be here anymore.

She didn't want to be here anymore.

She wanted all the pain to end.

Maybe.

Just maybe.

It would end this time, maybe this was here time to leave.

**Maybe. **


	14. Waking Up Again

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Thirteen ~ **

**~ Sonny ~ **

I wake up again.

I didn't even want to wake up, more so than last time and yet here I am, opening my eyes. Why can't I get anything right? I can't even die.

I sigh as I look outside my hospital window at my mum, she just looks at me sadly and turns away, not coming in this time but instead talking to a young doctor. I close my eyes and imagine being somewhere else, anywhere other than this place. As long as it was away from here, I don't care. As far away from these pure white walls, closing in on me. They were so clean unlike me. I can't even stand looking at them anymore, it's not fair. I shouldn't be here, the only people who should be stuck in this place is those who need help, those who deserve help. Even if I did need help, I will never deserve it.

Five words just keep running through my mind, _I can't even kill myself. _

I close my eyes wishing I could go back in time and change everything I let myself become, everything I had let myself become. This wasn't the Hollywood life I had imagined, I didn't want this, I didn't mean to. Things got out of hand and now I don't know how to make everything better, I don't know how to change everything. I don't know what to do.

A lone tear falls down my cheek and I turn on my side, it all would have been so much better if I had died. It would have been so much easier, not just for me but for everyone else.

It's not long until I am out of hospital, everything was getting too much in there, I just wanted to go home and see my friends – well after the other night, friend – April.

Tawni, Nico and Grady probably never want to see me again and I don't blame them, not after what I have done to them. I wouldn't hate them if they never want to speak to me again, never wanted to be my friend again. I would probably feel the same if it was one of them.

I don't know what came over me that night, I don't know what had happened to me. It seems like everything had built up and I took it out on the only people who have ever loved me, who accepted for me for everything I was and who understood. I had lost the first real friends I ever had thanks to my own weaknesses, I couldn't even handle being in Hollywood. I don't know why I ruined everything, I only ended up damaging my own hopes and dreams. I am only hurting myself.

I sling my bag over my shoulder, I hadn't been anywhere since I got out of hospital a few days ago, I have been completely numb, just laying in my bed, trying to not think, not to do anything really. I just lay there, looking up at my ceiling. I wouldn't eat, I wouldn't drink, I wouldn't even bother with the drugs I had hidden under my floorboard. I couldn't move or speak, I just thought about how I shouldn't be here right now, today was the first day I actually got out of bed.

I sigh loudly and look at the floorboard which I know my secret stash of pot and cocaine is under, I shake my head and bite down on lip, I have managed to go this long without any so I can go some more. I walk out of my bedroom, smiling at my mum before grabbing a piece of toast, telling him that I am going to the studios and walk out as quickly as I can before she can stop me. She seems protective of my at the moment, I know she has every right to be. I would be as well, but I need to get something sorted. Well try to get something sorted.

I walk into the prop room, sighing, I knew I wasn't allowed to be here but I only needed to speak to my friends. I only needed to say sorry. I grinned when I saw them,

"Guys!" Nico and Grady nodded, looking away from me and Tawni looked behind me, trying to avoid my eyes,

"Please... don't ignore me." I whisper to them, looking down at the floor,

"What? Do you want to be best friends again after everything you have done?"

"I don't expect you to but I need you to know how sorry I am and it will never happen again. I am so sorry." I look at them hoping for some reaction,

"Sorry doesn't cut it Sonny, come on guys." Tawni walked away from her, dragging Nico and Grady with her,

"Please!" I shout behind them,

"Until you get yourself sorted out, we ain't allowed to hang around with you." Tawni sighed, turning around a little before walking off again. I nodded and watched them walk away, Nico looking at me and mouthing sorry. I was the one who was supposed to be sorry, not them. Not him, never him.

It should be me.

I shake my head and realize my whole body is shaking, I look around and sigh, I couldn't take this anymore. I ran all the way home, ignoring my mum as I ran past her and into my bedroom. I locked the door behind me and lifted up the floorboard, staring at the stash that I had hidden so long ago. I look away for a minute, trying to talk myself out of it, trying to give myself reasons for why I shouldn't do it but there always seems to be more reasons to do it. It always seems to be going towards the one thing I know I shouldn't do, the one thing I should hate.

I smile to myself as I grab the packet, almost greedily.

This was who I am, this was my life from now and I was just going to accept that.


	15. Dad

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter 14 ~ **

**~ Sonny ~ **

I wake up the next morning, feel better than I had felt in a while. I smile as I remember the wonderful, familiar feeling of last night. Even when I was alone, it still felt good. I sighed as I got out of bed, trying to ignore the voices I could hear outside. I couldn't make out who it was with my mum, I could hear her clearly, but the other person seemed to be whispering. Like they didn't want me to know they were here, like they had something to hide. I rolled my eyes as I opened my door and looked at the man just casually sitting on the dining table, mine and Connie's dining table. I shook my head and laugh,

"What the hell is he doing here?" I walk past him and sit on the settee, trying to ignore him.

"He is your father Sonny, we are worried about you."

"Well don't be, I am fine."

"No you're not. Look at you, you look a mess. You need to get your priorities sorted young lady." I sigh and then look at my escape route, I am sure April wouldn't mind me turning up at hers at 10am, she said I was welcome anytime.

"Now look, we have some amazing rehabilitation camps for you to attend."He tries to hand me some leaflets, but I shake my head and look away from him. I won't go anywhere, I don't need any help at all. I am fine. I grit my teeth, avoiding anyone's glance, I don't want to be put away for doing nothing. I haven't hurt anyone.

"You don't have to look at them Sonny." My mum.. Connie, speaks up,

"We will choose for you, we don't mind." I look at her in surprise,

"No way. You said you loved me, why would you do this to me?"

"Because you have changed, and I want my old Sonny back." I shake my head and get up, eying the door, I can tell she knows I am going to run, I see it in her eyes, but I am too fast for her. I grab the door handle and run as fast as I can to April's. She is the only one left now, she is the only one who will keep me safe from everything and everyone, she won't grass me up. She won't let me get into one of those places, she is just the same as me. She understands me.


	16. Taken Away

**Disclaimer: See last chapter **

"I hate you" Sonny screamed as loud as she could towards Connie and the man who called himself her father. She shook her head at them as someone dragged her into a large blue van, she ignored the tears running down her face as she gave them both dirty looks.

"I will kill you! You made her do this to me, you're both dead to me!" She looked away from them as she was seated in the van, she couldn't even stand to look at them anymore.

She shook her head as angry tears ran down her face, she won't let them win though. She didn't need any help, not that she thought anyway.

She didn't look at anyone else when she got onto a huge bus, it wasn't packed but it wasn't as empty as she thought it would be. It was just full of pathetic teenagers all with their own problems – but she didn't have a problem, she tried to convince herself. She was just too much trouble for everyone to handle now.

She sighed as she grabbed a seat right at the back, away from everyone else and looked out of the window. She had no idea where she was being taken, and she didn't care because she thought they would know she didn't belong there with everyone else soon.

"Right! Listen up! Anything I , or any other counsellors here, tell you, you do! Whether you like it or not, you are going to do it. Is that clear?" Everyone nodded slowly but Sonny just stood there and rolled her eyes.

"There are a lot of rules here, all of which you have to get used to." He carried on,

"And for those of you who think that you're immune to the rules, such as Hollywood starlet over there, think again." He looked over at Sonny as she raised an eyebrow, getting off the bus when he said so, bumping into a woman on her way out.

"What is this?" She grabbed the cigarettes that Sonny had hidden in her coat,

"Give them back, they're mine!" She shook her head and laughed,

"Think again young lady, now then you have heard the rules, don't even think about pushing your luck here. I am going to be on your back for the next six weeks so I would watch every single step you take if I was you."

"Whatever." She walked away from her, the word diva ringing in her head as she did so, she had no idea why but she agreed with the word that Chad had called her long before any of this happened.

"I have seen people like you come and go here, I know how to handle the little celebrities like you."

"You don't know anything about me."

"I know your type, I know all of the crap you pull." She dragged Sonny towards everyone else, Sonny sighed when she realized she was going to put up with all of this crap for the next six weeks. She wouldn't be here that long though, it was going to be okay, they were going to see that she wasn't like everyone else, they would notice.. they would have to, she thought to herself.

"Now you're all here to change your lives and realize what you have done wrong and why you are here right now." Sonny rolled her eyes and scoffed at him,

"Do you have a problem?" He bent down next to her and looked right into her eyes, instantly making her feel uncomfortable.

"With all of this crap? Yes I do."

"Don't think you can get away with that behaviour here, this place is going to teach you how to find yourself all over again."

"Give me a break." Sonny mutters when he stands up,

"Right, I knew I would have enough of this Hollywood act you have going on, drop and give me twenty!" Sonny looked up at him and giggled,

"What do you think this is? The army?"

"It's whatever I make it to be, thirty."

"No!"

"Forty."

"What?! That's not fair."

"Fifty."

"Fine." Sonny muttered as she lay on the snowy ground,

"One." He counted every time she did one, still going over the rules with everyone else. It carried on until she finally collapsed on the ground,

"Maybe that will teach you a lesson from now on." He looked around, still spouting off the rules. She sighed as she knelt back down and packed her bag for the actual camping trip they were about to take. She looked around to make sure nobody was looking as she grabbed the kitchen knife next to her and slipped it into her bag. She sighed as everyone else got up and she stood up as well. It was going to be a long six weeks.

**A/N: Someone in a review said this was like 'Augusta, Gone.', so I went away and watched it. Thank you for giving me the name of that film, it was amazing. I am so glad I watched it. **

**This chapter was kind of taken from the film, I wasn't originally going to do this but I thought this actually fitted in well with the story. **

**Please review **


	17. Blood

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

Sonny shook her head as she watched everyone try to light a fire, she was finding it funny. She looked away from them every single time they looked at her, taking no interest in them at all. She didn't know anything about camping, and she didn't want to know anything about it either.

She shook her head and looked over at another group who finally lit their fire, and were now eating food. But she didn't care, she didn't need food anyway, she wasn't even hungry. She closed her eyes as she thought about her life before all of this happened to her, before she decided that she was going to go off the rails.

She shuddered and pulled her knees to her chest, putting her head on her knees and trying not to think about the worst that could happen while she was there. She hated herself for being here, she blamed herself. She knew she had to deal with the consequences of her behaviour, she had brought all this on herself and this was all her problem.

"Team work Allison." Someone touched her shoulder causing her to jump up quickly, putting her arms over her chest when she saw everyone look towards her with shocked looks on their faces. She shook her head and looked at the counsellor who had pulled her out of her thoughts,

"Whatever, I don't care." She muttered as she sat back down, looking away from her group, who cared if they didn't eat anyway? He just wanted to go home, she knew her mother wouldn't let her stay here if she wasn't eating. She would take her home and let her get over it by herself, she hoped.

That night she looked at her fellow 'campers' sleeping as she grabbed the kitchen knife out of her bag, everyone was asleep so she could finally do what she had been waiting to do all day. She thought about how she didn't belong here, the people who were sleeping around her, they needed and deserved help and she didn't. She was only here because her parents couldn't handle her anymore and because she had no friends and no life. She wasn't here because she had to be, she was here because they wanted her to be – so she thought.

She sighed as she dragged the knife across her wrist as deep as she could manage. She smiled when she felt the pain run through her body, it felt so good, it felt so real. She almost felt happy when she saw the blood trickle down he wrist and onto her bag, it felt good to know that she was still alive and that she was still Sonny somewhere deep down.

She wrapped an old shirt around her bleeding wrist and wiped away the tears falling down her eyes, she looked up at the night sky and closed her eyes. It was hard to imagine what she was like this time a whole year ago, she couldn't remember it well. But she knew it was better than this, she had friends and an amazing boyfriend, she was on a comedy show.

"**I have nobody, **

**I am nobody." **

She whispered to herself before closing her eyes.


	18. New Friend

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

"Hey." Sonny looked up at the girl standing over her and sighed, she was sitting down on the grass, thinking to herself as usual. She had been there for three whole weeks and had yet to speak to anyone or help in anyway. She was still waiting for the day people would realize that she wasn't meant to be there, waiting for the moment someone would come up to her and tell her she could go home.

She laughed bitterly to herself – it hadn't happened yet, but there was always the possibility.

Sonny nodded at the girl, trying to look away. The girl had been her 'hiking buddy' since they had both arrived at the camp. Sonny hadn't said one word to her, and she wanted to keep it that way. The girl just smiled and sat down next to her as though Sonny's blatant ignorance was an invitation for her to sit down and speak to her some more.

Sonny looked away from her and stared out at the mountain they were about to climb. She looked at the top, this time tomorrow or maybe the next day they would be halfway up there. Sonny bit down on her lower lip, she would probably be wondering what was on the other side this time tomorrow.

Her parents?

Friends?

Anyone?

Or would there just be more loneliness, pain and more hate waiting for her?

Maybe there was nothing or nobody left for her, nobody was going to wait for her. She had let so many people down, why would they even think about waiting for her to get her act together again?

She looked down as she thought about everything she had messed up, she had ignored her best friends and family, she thought she had known best when she didn't. She didn't know anything, she was the only one who had messed everything up. She was the one who should have listened to them, she never should have gone off with April just to get back at Chad. She should never have let herself get this way.

She shook her head as she thought, 'I shouldn't be here... I shouldn't belong here...'

"Look, none of us want to be here but we are all trying to get on and you should make the effort as well." Sonny sighed, she knew that the girl was right, none of them had asked to be put there. Every single one of them had been put there by parents, other family members, social workers... they had all been forced into this, none of them had woken up one morning and thought about this stupid camp. None of them thought to themselves that taking drugs/alcohol would make them end up in a place like this. Nobody had actually longed for this.

She nodded and then looked at the girl sitting next to her, it was the first time Sonny had looked at anyone properly. She took in her appearance – her mousy brown hair, hazel eyes, pale complexion. Sonny looked down at her body, the girl was tall and was way too thin for her height. She was pretty but not beautiful. Her beauty was subtle, she was shy and she didn't make too much effort but Sonny knew that if she did make some effort then she could turn heads easily.

Sonny smiled at her and then shrugged,

"I know that... I just, I don't have a problem."

"You don't think you have a problem but that may not be the case." Sonny laughed a little and then held out her hand to her politely – having got over the 'I'm a hugger' thing.

"Allison." The girl grinned and flicked her hair back out of her face, holding out her hand as well to shake,

"Gemma."

"So what are you doing here? If you don't mind me asking?" Sonny grabbed a stick and started carving her name into the mud as Gemma looked away.

"I-I don't know. I take a lot of drugs, I have been in and out of hospital because of overdoses. I just want to die..." She paused and Sonny looked up at her, a small frown forming on her face, nodding to let her know that she was listening.

"These boys in school, they did something to me at a party... I guess I went a little off the rails after that because nobody would believe me." She whispered, Sonny noticed a shining tear that fell down her face, Sonny grabbed her hand and smiled,

"I believe you." She nodded and wiped away the tear as she squeezed Sonny's hand,

"Thank you, you have no idea how much that means to me."

"It's okay... I don't know what I would do if that happened to me and nobody believed me. I think I would have done the same as you to be honest." Sonny looked away from her new friend and looked at the mountain, wondering what she would have done if something bad had actually happened to her, wondering if something bad had ever happened to her...

"What about you? Why are you here?" Sonny shrugged and wrinkled her nose,

"I did a lot of drugs as well... I go to a lot of parties and drink loads. I do stuff with boys, I abandoned all my friends and family, my television program... I guess nobody can handle me anymore."

"Why do you do all that?" Sonny thought for a moment and shook her head, trying to fight the tears,

"I don't even know to be honest. I have no idea what happened to me, I guess I just let everything get to me..." She sighed and Gemma seemed to accept it, she looked at Sonny for a moment and squeezed her hand which was still in hers.

"I saw you hurt yourself the other night... I have seen you do it a few times... you need to stop."

"Oh.. I thought everyone was asleep." Sonny quickly pulled away and wrapped her arms around her knees, trying to ignore her once more.

"I-I won't tell anyone, don't worry about that. It's just if you don't stop then you can forget about going home in three weeks." Sonny snapped her head up to look at Gemma with a confused look on her face.

"What?!"

"The send people like us to this place, it's a massive school with teenagers who cause too many problems for those around them. It's just like this place without all the walking, they send you there if this place doesn't help you. They try to cure you and when it doesn't work they just keep you there, sending you back and forth between this and that place." She sighed and then looked down at the ground, trying to stop tears falling down her face.

"Have you been there?" She nodded,

"How many times?"

"If I go back again then it would be my third time."

"Wow." Sonny muttered, she nodded lightly and then took a deep breath.

"It's horrible there, they are so strict. You're not allowed off the premises unless you're good and even then it is with your parents. They just make you hate yourself even more, even if they don't mean to." She looked away before standing up,

"Hopefully you won't have to go there though." Sonny nodded and smiled,

"Hopefully." Sonny got up and put her arm around her shoulder as they walked back to the camp. She noticed one of the counsellors muttered something to another counsellor once they saw the two girls, smiling over at them. Sonny nodded at them and sat down next to her bag, looking at Gemma when she sat down next to her.

Sonny liked the girl because she was so quiet, it meant there wasn't a lot of awkward silences between the two because neither of them were in the mood for stupid conversation fillers. They both liked to think, they don't mind the silence.

Sonny looked around the camp fire, it was 'circle time' again. Every single night there is a different question, a question that Sonny would either refuse to answer or mutter a pointless one worded answer.

"Tonight we are getting serious, we want to know why you think that you're here, Carl can you start please?" A boy sitting next to the counsellor nodded and stared into the fire, Sonny rolled her eyes, she had no idea what she was going to say.

"I think I am here because my mum didn't want to see me hurt myself anymore. I would come home every single night, drunk and violent and I would lash out at her for no reason and then run to my bedroom to cut myself." Sonny looked at the deep scars on his arms and thought about her own.

"She couldn't stand it anymore and I don't blame here. Being here, with all of you, you have all helped me so much." He quickly glanced at Sonny before turning away again, she rolled her eyes because she knew that look meant everyone except her. She wondered if he was just saying it to please the counsellors or if he really felt that way, she bit down on her lip in thought as she tried to think of what she would say.

She sighed when they finally got to her and looked down at the ground, thinking, always thinking and never speaking.

"I guess... I am here because my parents couldn't handle my behaviour anymore. They didn't want to handle it. I was too much of a pain for them, I cause too much hassle and I was always letting them down." She sighed and looked at Gemma, begging her with her eyes to take over but Robert, one of the counsellors stood up and shook his head,

"Carry on Allison." She shook her head,

"I don't have anything else to say."

"Why don't you tell us why you feel that way?"

"I feel like that because it's the truth..."

"Other than that."

"I guess because I have to look in my mum's eyes every single day and see all the hurt I caused her, I have to see all that disappointment, the anger and the sadness. I caused all of that and I don't know how I can stop myself from doing it. I was fine last year, I was living in Hollywood and I had good friends, a boyfriend and I was on television... I haven't always been like this. I guess, it hurts her because nothing ever happened to me, she has never done anything to me and neither did anyone else... nobody has hurt me physically..."

"But someone has emotionally?" One of the other girls spoke up, Sonny stared at her for a moment before nodding,

"Yeah, I guess.. but it only made me worse. I was smoking and stuff before that, I guess it tipped me over the edge?"

"A boy?" One of the boys wrinkled his nose at the thought of Hollywood good girl being stuck here because of some boy, Sonny laughed a little and then nodded,

"I loved him a lot and he said he couldn't handle the new rebellion route I was taking. He said he didn't want me anymore, that he wasn't going to waste his precious time with someone like me. He thinks he should have known better than to ever date someone from Chuckle City." She sighed and looked up at Robert but he shook his head, forcing her to carry on.

"Think about something that happened before that, secrets, parents, something." She shrugged,

"My mum and dad broke up a while ago.. I see him now and then but only when I want to. It's too hard because he chooses his new family over me even though I was there before them, he rushed off because his new girlfriend wanted him all for herself. He just left me in their house a few months ago, not even caring what I was doing. Not even wanting to know, he only had me over because he had to, he could go for years without seeing me.. he has before. He just keeps coming back, determined to hurt me even more."

"I am sure that's not true, some people don't know how to be good parents, and because your dad wasn't there for you during a lot of your childhood I am guessing that he doesn't know how to be a dad to you. He doesn't know what to do and he can't help you, not because he doesn't want to but because he just can't. It's hard when you have a sixteen year old girl who you may not have seen in a long time. It's hard to know how to react." Sonny nodded at Samantha, the girl always spoke up, she was intelligent and beautiful. She was here because she couldn't even go one hour without her next hit, she was abused by her own mother when she was younger, Sonny could remember her story from ages ago, she had never told her own though.

"I guess you're right." Sonny muttered, Samantha smiled and then looked back at the fire in the middle, thinking to herself.

"I had the most amazing friends and I ruined it all because I wanted to do something different... I wanted to show Chad Dylan Cooper that I didn't need or want him. I started hanging around with April and I knew how much they would hate me for doing it but I was hurting so much, I wanted to do stuff I knew Chad would never approve of, I didn't want to hurt my friends. I didn't want them to be dragged into my own stupid games, I love them so much.. they are amazing friends." She sighed and looked at Gemma again, hoping Robert would let it pass this time. She sighed in relief when he nodded in understanding, she had no idea what had brought on the sudden change in her behaviour, what had made her open up to everyone for the first time since she had been here.

"I am here because my dad hates me, simple as that." She looked at the person next to her but was told to go on, Sonny bit down on her lip and shook her head, she knew Gemma didn't want to carry on, it wasn't fair on her.

"I don't want to talk about it."

"You have to."

"No I don't! What the hell is this?" Sonny watched as she chucked down the stick she had been holding in her hands and stormed off, crying. Sonny looked around for a moment, not sure what to do before deciding to run after the girl, not wanting her to get lost in the woods.

"What's wrong?" She walked up behind her as she sat down on the muddy floor, huddled up with tears running down her face, she shrugged,

"I don't know anymore, I can't tell anyone. You believed me but that doesn't mean everyone else will, I can't do this Allison." She shook her head and Sonny put her hand on her shaking shoulder,

"It's going to be okay, I promise. I know people will believe you but if you don't want to tell people that's okay, I am always here for you to talk to and I always will be around to help you if you need me." She nodded, whispering a thank you. Sonny moved a little closer before wrapping an arm around Gemma's waist and putting her head on her shoulder. She smiled as she thought that it wasn't so bad after all, she could be out of here in no time and it would all be okay then.

She wondered if things could go back to the way they were before, if she could ever be Sonny again. It was all she wanted, she wanted the pain to go away and she wanted all the hate she felt to leave her. It wasn't much to ask for, was it?


	19. Letters From Home

**Disclaimer: I own nothing **

**~ Chapter Eighteen ~ **

**~ Sonny ~ **

I did get to the top of that mountain. I was wrong about what was waiting for me, because nothing but my friends that I had made during my stay here were on the other side. There were many more miles to go until we were allowed to go home. There would be more mountains to climb, more paths to stumble across, more rocks to fall over and more fields to trample across.

There was only another week to go; One whole week. One more climb, and over that mountain would be the people I love. They would be waiting for me, and then they were going to take me home. I know it.

I grin to myself as I think of home. A bed. A kitchen. A toilet. I grin as I think of the studios again, I hadn't been there in so long. Maybe they would take me back, maybe I could get back on track again.

"Letters!" Robert shouts as we all wake up the next morning and sit around the camp fire from last night. I smile at Gemma as she grabs a letter from Robert when he walks past. I notice she only has one, whereas others; Including myself, have several. I look through mine, four letters all together, I smile as I open the first one. Recognizing Tawni's handwriting.

_Dear Sonny, _

_I am so sorry for that night. I know I pushed you too far, and I regret it so much. I just miss everything... I miss who you used to be, I miss what good friends we all were and most of all I miss your silly, little sketches that you would perform with us. It's hard to focus on the show these days and not see you besides me. _

_I really miss you though and when I heard we were allowed to write to you I took the chance immediately. I love you so much and I really want you to be okay again, I want the old Sonny back, happy and everything. I miss it all Sonny, I miss you, and I wish I hadn't let you go off with April. I should have fought for you harder and I know what you're thinking, you have a mind of your own, and I couldn't tell you what to do. But I should have tried, I could see where it was going, where it could lead and now look where you are. _

_When you get out I hope you can move on from this, because we can. We won't do it all over again Sonny, we can't handle it all again, and as much as we miss you.. when you're hurting then so are we and we would do anything to stop your pain, we would love to know what caused this but you can't tell us until you find out yourself, and when you do I hope you can rely on us, I hope you can trust us enough to let us in. _

_I can't wait to see you. _

_I miss you_

_Tawni, x_

I wipe away a tear falling down my face when I fold up the letter and put it in my bag. I hurt them all so bad when I tried to stop my own pain. I was so selfish.

I smile at Nico's messy writing on the next envelope,

_Sonny, _

_It's not really the same without you around, it's a lot quieter that's for sure. It's not right without you, and when you come back to us I really hope you're okay again. _

_I was looking through photographs the other day, you have changed so much, I wish you hadn't. I don't know what happened, I guess you're lost. But when you find yourself again, I will still be here. I will always be here. I miss you a lot, and so does Tawni, she won't tell me that though, she is closed up right now, as usual; Like you! _

_Next time Sonny, promise me one thing, promise me that you will tell us something is wrong, tell us please.. We can't help you otherwise and I would love to be able to help you. I want you to be okay again and I want you to be happy. _

_I love you so much, _

_See you soon!_

_Love from Nico x_

I shake my head and laugh a little, I missed him so much, and everyone else. Nico could always make me laugh, even when I was down and I had ruined all of that.

I look at the remaining two letters and trace my fingers over the tiny writing on one envelope and decide to open the other one first.

_My beautiful Sonny, _

_We don't know where everything went wrong, and as much as we wish we did, we can't pin point exactly where we messed up. Now, I know what you're thinking; This was all you, not us. But we had some play in this, it may have been a delayed reaction to our divorce. We don't know if something happened to you one day, we don't know if anything happened to you... But we hope nothing did. But at the same time it would explain the sudden change in behavior, you were so beautiful, so calm and you were a wonderful girl. I know your dad hasn't been around much and he regrets that greatly, and it's all going to change when you come back. He has moved closer and you can visit him every single weekend and whenever you want to, you can go see him, I won't mind. We have been getting on amazingly well since you left, I know it's a bit late but we are going to try so hard when you come back. We promise that. _

_It's all going to be okay, when you are out of there, we will make sure you're happy. We will find out where something went wrong, and it will be okay again. _

_April has moved away, she went to Europe with a band, she said goodbye. We are sorry about her leaving, but then again it may be a good thing. The bad influence is gone, and maybe now you can move on and maybe you will be okay and happy when you are back. Maybe you can move on from all of this, and go back to the old Sonny Munroe we all know and love. _

_We will see you so soon. _

_Stay safe and strong _

_We love you so much our baby girl._

_Mum and Dad xxx_

I put the letter in my bag and let the tears fall down my face, my hands shaking as I reach for the next and last letter. I sigh as I open it and see his beautiful writing.

_My beautiful Sonny, _

_I am so sorry for everything, I didn't want to break up with you. I still love you, I think I always will to be honest. I miss you so much and I wish I could have handled it all, I don't know what was wrong with me. I love you and that will never change, I think you're amazing, beautiful, funny and wonderful. You're so different from my last girlfriends, you're so much better than all of them. You're the one I let get away from me, and if I could turn back time and make sure both of us forgot that one thing; that would be it. I would hold you when you cried, and I would make sure nothing bad ever happened to you._

_The day we found you in that room, with that boy, and you were high on drugs, practically naked... All I could think about was how lost you looked, how depressed, how desperate you were. You still looked beautiful but you were not the Sonny I fell in love with, you were not the one I miss, I don't know what happened Sonny, I wish I could figure it all out but you are just like a closed book. I wish I could take away all the pain you are feeling, I want to be able to kiss you and hold you in my arms, I want to tell you everything is okay and I want to let you know how much I love you. I am always going to be here, and I really hope when you get out of there you can run back into my arms. If you can ever forgive me. _

_I just want to see you smile again. _

_I need to know you're okay and happy. _

_I love you, you're my world, I have memorized every single thing about you. Your beautiful, chocolate brown eyes, so deep and so hidden. The small blush you get every time I kiss you, the way you look away from me and try to get away when you feel like you're going to cry. I love your grin, it always looks like you're up to something. I love the way you smile at me when you say hello, I even love the way you frown. You look beautiful even when you're angry. _

_You could be someone Sonny, you could make anything of yourself one day, and when you're better you're going to carry on doing well on 'So Random' and then you're going to go onto bigger and better places,, ask anyone, we all know you're going places, you're going to be okay. _

_Right now, you're so far away, I miss you so much, I wish you were laying next to me, I wish you were asleep in my arms, I wish I could reach out and hold you right now. I wish I could kiss you. I wish I could hold your hand. _

_And when you come back, I really hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me for being so selfish, I miss you so much and I love you... I want you to be happy, and if being without me makes you happy then I could accept that. I will just be friends, if that is what you want. As long as I can hold you again, I don't mind. As long as you let me look into those deep eyes, and as long as you let me touch your warm skin. I just want to be with you, you are the Juliet and I, Romeo. You are the love of my life, and I would die for you, I would die if I had to live without you I think. It took you being away for me to realize this, and I am sorry about that. _

_I LOVE YOU _

_Chad, forever yours xxxxxxxxxxxxxx_

I wipe away the tears from my face and keep the letter in my hands for a minute before looking up at Gemma, I watch as she looks at the one letter in her hand with disgust.

"What's wrong?' She shakes her head at me as she storms off into the woods, to think on her own. This time I don't go after her, instead I pick up the letter she chucked on the floor.

"What was wrong with Gemma?" Carl smiles at me as he sits next to me, I open the crumpled letter and read it quickly. Shaking my head and muttering an 'oh no' when I was finished, handing it to Carl and looking around for Robert or someone.

"She is being sent back to that place." Carl gulped and looked at the direction she had run to. I nodded,

"Her Dad don't want her there, he can't handle it, he thinks sending her there is the answer but it's only going to make her worse, it's only going to make her hate herself more than she already does. He is seriously deluded if he thinks he is helping her." I sigh and get up to walk after Gemma, she will only need a few minutes alone before I talk to her.

I can't believe she is being sent back to that place, she won't be able to handle it one more time. I won't be able to see her again.

I shake my head and kick a rock when I think about never seeing one of my best friends ever again, it would be too hard.


	20. Parents

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Nineteen ~ **

Sonny smiled at Gemma as best she could but the girl just shook her head, watching as everyone else started to walk over to their parents. Sonny sighed and then started to look for her parents in the large crowd, she grinned when she spotted them both waving at her. She nodded at the counsellors and then wrapped her arms around Gemma before running over to them, waving back.

"Mum, dad." She grinned and wrapped her arms tightly as she could around her mum's neck, she seemed surprised for a moment but soon wrapped her arms around her daughters waist.

"I missed you." Connie whispered into her hear, Sonny nodded and then pulled away, looking at her dad, giving him an awkward hug for a second and then looked around as her friends greeted their parents..

"How is it?" Sonny shrugged,

"I hated it at first, but I have made good friends and I am starting to see what I did wrong. I am staring to see where everything messed up."

"Are they good?" Her mum said, nodding towards the counsellors, Sonny nodded and then looked over at Robert,

"They helped a lot I guess."

"That's good then." Sonny laughed a little and then started to walk over to the drinks table, her parents following her.

"I can come home, right?"

"They asked to talk to us first, before we made any decisions." A wave of panic rushed over Sonny and she struggled to think for a moment, she couldn't be sent away again. She shook her head,

"Don't make me stay here, I can't handle this anymore." She whispered, her breath shook as she spoke, and she rolled up her sleeves, revealing her deep scars.

"I hate it here, you can't make me stay here. I can't handle it, I don't belong here. I never have and I never will, please don't make me stay." A lone tear fell from her eye but she didn't make a move to wipe it away. She wanted them to see her cry, she wanted them to see her scars, she needed them to feel guilty enough to let her go home.

"We are sorry baby..."

"No! I am not going to stay here." Sonny got up from the seat she had been sitting on, shaking her head and ignoring the prying eyes around her.

"Did you know about this?" Connie turned to face Robert as he approached them calmly, he nodded, looking at Sonny's scars.

"We dealt with it at the time, it hasn't happened since we found out and it wont' happen again. We would have told you if it was serious, we would have mentioned it if she carried on. But she hasn't and none of the cuts were deep enough to go to the emergency room with, she is fine." He looked at Sonny and she put her arms over her chest, looking away, over at Gemma.

"Go over there for a moment Sonny." Robert said, Sonny sighed heavily and then walked over to Gemma, shaking her head. She looked over towards her parents, not sure if she wanted to know her fate.

"They don't want me." She muttered as she continued to stare at them, walking over to them when Robert called her back after a while. She walked over thee slowly, her arms still over her chest, refusing to smile.

"We are going to talk later, but we have some group stuff to do first, okay?" She nodded at him, knowing better than to get on his bad side. She looked at her parents, sighing and dropping her arms to her sides.

"Now then, I want you to turn to your children and tell them why you sent them here." Sonny looked up at Robert when his voice could clearly be heard. Sonny's dad cleared his throat and then looked at his daughter,

"I sent you here because I want you to find out what it is you're missing. You are so lost Sonny, I know you're not a bad kid though. I know I haven't been around much, I know that I have hurt you in the past but it's going to change from now on. I thought it would be better to send you somewhere you can get help, I wanted you to be happy again. I don't like seeing you hurting so much, I can't stand to see the pain in your eyes. I just want you to discover yourself again, I want you to be at peace with yourself. We both love you so much." He reached out a hand for her but Sonny took a step back, shaking her head, warning the man not to touch her. He understood and dropped his arm, looking at Connie.

"I sent you here because I couldn't help you anymore, all I have ever wanted to do is see you happy, to smile when you smile, to laugh when you do. But when the sparkle went from your eyes, you would no longer smile, you never laughed and you were no longer the person I had brought up. You don't even know who you are anymore Sonny. You have lost so much, so many friends and I want to make it all better for you. I know the only way I can help you is by making sure that you get the help that you need. I had to send you here because it came to a point where I could no longer save you from yourself. I didn't know what else to do and I am sorry for letting it get this far." Connie looked down at the floor, leaving Sonny standing there with the sudden urge to close the gap between them and wrap her arms around the crying woman. But she wouldn't let herself, she wasn't going to let them win. She wasn't planning on making any of this easy for them.

She nodded once at them, watching Robert walk up behind them and put his hand on Sonny's dad's shoulder and smile at him.

"Don't do this." She shook her head, gulping, trying her best not to cry.

"I am so sorry baby girl." Connie shook her head, Sonny looked down at the floor, they couldn't do this to her. She didn't mean for things to get this bad, she didn't want to be sent away again.

She wanted to get down on her knees and beg for them to let her stay with them, to let her be happy again. She wanted to tell her mum that she wanted her help, not some strangers.

But she didn't, she stood there and remained stubborn, refusing to look at them and instead focusing on her shoes.

"She will be okay." Robert said as he moved to Sonny's side, but Sonny looked at him and shook her head – he was wrong. She wouldn't be okay, she was never going to be okay. He took her arm and led her over to the small group of teenagers by the van, grabbing her bag on the way there.

Sony nodded at Gemma and Robert finally let go. She looked back at her parents,

"You're going to regret this." She shouted at them, watching them turn away and go back to their happy lives. She sighed as she climbed into the van, she didn't want to do this, she didn't want to go this place. She didn't belong there.


	21. Us

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Twenty ~**

Sonny slowly got off the bus and looked around at the teenagers all rushing to their next class. She looked over at Gemma who was standing next to her, since the journey all the colour had drained from her face. Sonny noticed the girls hands had been shaking when they were on their way here, she wondered what it was about this place that was so horrible.

She smiled at Gemma and linked her arm in hers, trying to reassure her that this time she had someone with her. This time Sonny was going to help her. This time was going to be her last time here. Sonny was going to make sure of that.

She sighed as they followed the counsellor in front of them, showing everyone around. Sonny rolled her eyes, not really listening as she stared at the other people there.

"They are like robots." Gemma whispered in her ear, Sonny giggled and then nodded when two girls looked at them, not moving.

"That would make a good sketch, remind me when we get out of here." Gemma laughed and nodded, freezing when a large woman started walking over to them. Sonny squeezed her arm gently, asking her what was wrong. She shook her head and carried on watching the woman that was walking down the steps towards the large building.

"Nice to see you again Gemma." Sonny noticed the emphasis on the word again and sighed, Gemma nodded and looked down at the floor.

"Who is she?" Sonny whispered,

"One of the shrinks." She wrinkled her nose in disgust,

"She will probably have you as well, she thinks people like us are a big challenge. She sure does like a challenge." Sonny took a step back, letting go of her arm and shaking her head, not understanding.

"People like us?"

"You know what I mean, people with drink or drug issues, people who try to kill themselves, people who.." She grabbed Sonny's arm and lifted up her sleeve, pointing at the scars,

"do that." She finished and Sonny shook her head, pulling her arm away and wiping away the tears that fell down her face.

"Whatever." She muttered, she couldn't think of anything else to say because she knew Gemma was right, people like _us. _She knew she was no better than anyone else there, she was just like them, maybe even worse than some of them.

The moment of realization hit her when she took a look around her, she finally understood that she was one of them. She thought she had been different all that time, but she wasn't.

It was no longer Sonny and them to her anymore, it was _us. _

"_Just like us." _She kept repeating in her head, **us. **


	22. School

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Twenty One ~ **

"Oh Sonny, Sonny, Sonny..." Sonny rolled her eyes at the woman in front of her as she got up out of her seat and she walked over to the other side of the room, looking out of the large window.

"What?" She muttered under her breath, turning around to stare at her.

"You think you have it all figured out, don't you?"

"Obviously." She rolled her eyes again and then turned away again, counting down the minutes until she could get out of there, waiting for the bell to ring signalling the next lesson. She hated the whole hour she had to spend with the shrink, the woman had never shut up, she wanted to cure everyone, fix them, make them into someone else. Someone Sonny knew she couldn't be at the moment. She didn't want to be Sonny again, she couldn't be the old Sonny that people seemed to love so much, she had no idea where to find her, how to get her back.

She knew that she had to find her again, she knew that she had to be the same old Sonny she was before. But she had lost everything and she had no idea how to fix it all again. Jane, the shrink at the school, thought that she could help her, but Sonny knew that she could never get the help until she wanted it.

"You think you know the best ways to get out of here, that's why you don't speak to anyone except Gemma and you don't do anything that we could deem as bad."

"I have no idea what you're on about."

"What if I told you that the best way to get out of here, one of the only ways of getting out of here, is to find yourself'?"

"Wow! That was deep." Sonny's voice dripped with sarcasm as she sighed, folding her arms over her chest, she didn't think she could take much more of this woman's crap, she didn't care about finding herself, she only cared about going home.

She ran over to grab her bag on the chair the moment the bell went off, grinning to herself as the ran out of the room.

"Oh my God, that dragged." She sighed and shook her head as she ran past Gemma, grabbing her arm on the way out of the school doors. She looked around quickly and then took her behind a tree.

"She was going on about finding myself or something." She giggled as they sat down and looked out beyond the large gates that surrounded the whole building.

"We are going to get out of here one day Gemma, I don't know... but I will make sure that you are okay. You can come home with me and live with me." She grinned and then grabbed her hand,

"There is enough room in my bedroom for another bed, it would be amazing. And you could go the school by me..."

"Sonny..."

"And then you could meet my best friends and you could come to the studios and hang out with us sometimes..." She carried on, having no regard for Gemma at all as she was in her own little world, a perfect world where things seemed to work out for the best. Even though it may not be that way in real life,

"Sonny come on." She looked down at her hands, Sonny finally stopped talking and noticed the sudden change in mood.

"What? You don't want to?"She wrinkled her nose and looked at her best friend,

"No! I would love to but it's your life, it's not mine..."

"Well I think that it could be yours soon, anything has to be better than this place... back and forth from here to the camp, do you want to carry on living like that?"

"No, but I don't have anywhere else to go Sonny, you know that. I can't go home and I a can't invade your home, your life is yours, it's not mine. I would only end up hurting you." Sonny shook her head,

"You're one of my best friends, you wouldn't hurt me." She said as she squeezed Gemma's hand,

"It's going to be okay."

"We need to get to class, toilet excuse again?" Sonny rolled her eyes,

"Damn, we won't be able to get away with that one for much longer."

"I am sure you can think of something when that one expires." Sonny nodded and laughed, grabbing her bag as she got up.

"Come one then... we have the joys of French."

- - - - - - -

"Sonny?" Gemma whispered, Sonny looked at her, rubbing her eyes. It was two in the morning, everyone else was asleep in the room.

"What?" She whispered back, laying back down and looking at her.

"I can't go to sleep." She muttered,

"I am sorry for waking you up."

"Don't worry, do you want to talk about it?" She nods slowly and Sonny got up out of her bed, sitting on the end of Gemma's bed.

"I am always here for you, don't worry about that."

"Thank you."

"No problem, now tell me."

"I-I... keep having these nightmares. I can't think about anything else, I close my eyes and all I can see is those boys. I can't think about about anything else, how am I supposed to get over it if it's the only thing I think about?" Sonny grabbed the girls shaking hands, and wiped away the tears that fell down her cheeks.

"It will get so much easier, I promise you that it will, it's not going to be this bad forever. You're going to be okay soon, I will make sure you are. But you have to tell someone else." She sniffed and the wiped away a tear falling from her eyes .

"I know but it's too hard to tell anyone, I don't want people to think I am lying, please don't make me tell." She started to sob as her body shook from all the tears, Sonny shook her head and the put her arm around the girl.

"It is going to be okay, I promise you, I won't make you tell anyone.. I won't. Not yet, not until you want to." Sonny whispered, rubbing her back.

"Thank you so much Sonny, I am so glad that I met you, I have no idea what I would do without you."

"Shame about the conditions we met on though." Sonny winked at her and laughed, pulling back from her to go back to her own bed.

"Night."

"Night Gemma." Sonny closed her eyes and thought about being back at the studios, She wanted to go back to that life again, she wanted to be the funny girl, she wanted to be happy again. She knew she couldn't live like this for much longer, she knew she couldn't sit there anymore while waiting for her next hit, she wasn't going to do it again.


	23. Mirror

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything, except the storyline**

**~ Chapter Twenty Two ~ **

**~ Sonny ~ **

I sigh as I walk from English and into Jane's office. Stupid sessions, I hate them, they are so boring. I have had exactly six weeks of them now. And I don't feel any different, so much for them working for everyone. Don't help Gemma either, it would of course help if she told them what was wrong with her, but she never opened her mouth about that. She wouldn't.

"We are going to try something different today." Jane says as I sit across from her, she is sitting behind her desk, looking through some paperwork as I set my bag down on the chair next to me.

"Okay whatever." I roll my eyes and look around her office, all the certificates on the wall, all the photographs surrounding room, all the people she has met and helped – their letters are pinned up on a big board on one side – sometimes I look at them and wonder if I will ever send her one of these, if I will be sending her photographs of my new life, letters on how amazing it is. How much better I am.

Even if I was better though, would I thank her? Would I send her letters full of fake gratitude and happy memories of this place?

I look at her as I she picks up a small mirror and holds it out to me, I look at her raising one eyebrow, taking the mirror slowly.

"What do I do with this?" I don't nod towards it, I don't even want to look in it, I don't want to see the mess I have become, I ain't ready for it yet.

"I want you to look into that mirror and tell me what you say, who you are." I laugh nervously, and shake my head,

"And what good is that? I don't think it would help me in anyway." I shrug and set the mirror down on her desk, shaking my head. I sigh as I look around the room, not looking at Jane.

"Just do it Sonny, there is no need to be awkward about this. It's not that hard, it's a simple task." I shrug again and watch her as she picks up the mirror, walking over to me and places it in front of me, I stare at my reflection and look away quickly., ashamed by what I see.

"Tell me what you see." She repeats, I roll my eyes and grab the mirror off her and stare into my eyes, thinking for a moment.

"I don't know, what do you want me to see?" She shakes her head,

"This is honesty Sonny, not what I want you to see."

"Give me an example then." I wrinkle my nose, not liking this task at all,

"Bad daughter." She sits down next to me, moving my bag out of the way. I nod once and then look into the mirror,

"I am a bad daughter."

"I want you to shout it Sonny."

"I am a bad daughter." I say a little louder, staring at my own reflection in disgust, that was the truth, I was a terrible daughter, stupid, ugly, fat, horrible, horrible daughter. I didn't even deserve my parents, someone like Gemma needed them. My mum was amazing, she would make a wonderful mum to someone who deserved it.

"Louder."

"BAD DAUGHTER!" I shout as loud as I can, holding back the tears, looking away from her and then back at the mirror,

"Bad daughter..." I whisper to myself, shaking my head.

"What else do you see?" I shrug and look deep into the mirror,

"Horrible friend, terrible girlfriend." She nods,

"What else Sonny?"

"Undeserving, stupid, stupid girl..."

"And?" I watch her edge closer, suddenly interested in what I am saying, I shake my head and go to set the mirror down, her hand stopping me, I look at the reflection again,

"Ugly, fat, stupid, worthless girl, okay?" I shake my head and look out of the large window, waiting for the bell to ring, knowing it wasn't going to go off anytime soon.

"You're a horrible person as well ain't you? You betray anyone who ever loved you? You steal from them and ignore them, you make them all hate you. You're hated Sonny." She whispers, I shake my head,

"No... No they don't hate me." Tears start falling down my face but this time I don't care, I don't bother holding them back.

"They don't hate me.." I whisper, chucking the mirror across the room, watching it as it smashes against the wall. I draw my knees up to my chest and look out of the window, not noticing Jane move to the other side of me and put her arm around me,

"I thought you were supposed to help me, not screw me up even more than I already am. I thought you were here to make me better.."

"I had to know what you were thinking Sonny, I have found the one thing you know is not true - You're not hated." She smoothed out my hair, as the tears carry on falling down my face, I sniff and look at her for a moment,

"They should hate me though, I would hate me if I was them.. I hate me..." I sigh as I curl up tightly, hiding my face from her.

"It's okay, we need to work on everything else, we need to make sure you realize that you're none of those things. We are finally getting somewhere, it's okay."

"Can I go now?" She nods and I grab my bag, running out of there and into the bathroom. Stupid girl. I opened up to her and now she knows exactly how I feel. Now she knows who I really am. Now she thinks she can help me, I don't need her help, I don't want her help.


	24. Freedom

**Disclaimer: See last chapter **

**~ Chapter Twenty Three ~ **

**~ Sonny ~ **

"Is your Dad coming?" I sit next to Gemma and she shakes her head, I sigh loudly and put my hand on top of hers.

"It'll be okay, I promise. I better be off, see you soon." I roll my eyes and then wink at her as I stand up, walking over to the crowd of people waiting for their own parents. I soon join them, watching as cars crowd into the large car park, waiting to see my mum and dad to climb out.

"Sonny!" I look over at them, grinning and running over to them; Forgetting everything that had happened last time, not wanting to remember anything I had said to them and it looked like they had done the same.

"Wow. You look so much better." Dad says as he kisses my cheek, hugging me tightly. I shake my head as I pat him on the back and then put my arms tightly around my mum,

"I miss you." She whispers into my ear and I nod,

"Miss you too old woman," I poke my tongue out at her, just like the old days. She laughs at me and then walks off, taking my hand as we walk around the grounds of the place I have called my home for two months now.

"How is it here?"

"Good, I get on with a lot of people in my classes, and I am on an average A grade." I grin at them, as I dig into my pockets for my report card, handing it proudly to my mum.

"Wow well done Sonny, this is the best you have ever done." I nod and then look around,

"There isn't much to do around here except study."

"I always knew you had it in you kid." She grins at me as she ruffles my hair, I laugh at her and then link my arm in hers as we carry on walking.

"I will show you my room if you both want?" I smile at them and lead the way when the nod. I need to show them that I am ready for this, I need to show them that I can come home and be safe. I can do this. I just need to make sure they believe me.

"Right we better be off to see this Jane now." I nod at them as we walk out of my room and towards the main building.

"Is she good?" I shrug,

"She thinks she is.." I laugh a little and then sigh,

"She is okay, she is helping me when I want it. But I will have days when I don't really care about anything she is saying." I look down at the floor, kicking a stone out of the way, smiling at them when I look up and open the door for them.

"This should be fun then.." I roll my eyes as we walk into her office, I don't bother knocking, she knows I am coming, she always knows when I am coming.

- - - - - - -

"Today Sonny, I want you to talk about everything you did while you were at home." I look up at her nervously, shooting glances towards my parents and shaking my head,

"Everything?"

"It's better to get off your chest, just try the honesty for once please Sonny." I sigh and nod, knowing she was right, so I take a deep breath.

"Um.. I would drink a lot... I would smoke pot and whatever else I could get my hands on." I looked down ashamed, avoiding their glances,

"I would sell pot for more money and steal from you two when I could... I smoked cigarettes, I do stuff with boys." My mum shoots a look at me but I shake my head and put my hand on top of hers,

"I promise you I haven't done that, I am still a virgin." She sighs a sigh of relief and smiles at me,

"That's one thing then," I nod at my own lie.. I couldn't tell her all the stuff I have done, it would break her heart and I can't do that to her. I can't let her know how many times I was so high I didn't know what I was doing, the times when I was so desperate I would just lay there and take whatever the guy wanted to do to me, just for my next hit. I shook my head and closed my eyes, quickly letting go of her hand and sighing,

"Are you okay?"

"Yes, I am fine.."

"Anything else Sonny?" I look at Jane and think for a moment,

"Everything?" I gulp and she nods once more, patiently. I look down,

"I sneak out to go to parties, I don't go to school much, and when I do I don't listen, I answer back to the teachers... and I stopped turning up to the studios all together, getting me kicked off the one thing I loved more than anything..."

"I umm.. I cut myself.. but I haven't done it since I got here.. I am fine now... I tried to kill myself twice before coming here as well.. before going to the camp as well.. I tried it, but I always failed."I look down at my hands, fighting the tears about to fall down my face. I shake my head and then look up at them, to see their smiling faces.

"Thank you for sharing that with us Sonny, it means a lot." My dad puts his hand on top of my shaking one and nods at me,

"It'll all be okay now." I look at him and nod, trying to believe the words I have told Gemma so many times.

"We are so sorry that we couldn't be here, was it the divorce? I hate the fact that we are to blame for this." He looks down and shakes his head, I grab his hand, squeezing it,

"It has nothing to do with you, it's all my choices. I am the only one to blame for this."

"I am so proud of you." My mum puts her arm around my shoulders, smiling at me and kissing my cheek gently.

"Thank you." I whisper to her, nodding at Jayne.

- - - - - - -

I grin as we walk out, "That was better than I thought it would be." They both look at each other and nod,

"A lot better."

"Mum, Dad... I don't belong here, please let me come home with you now." I stop in my tracks, turning to face them, begging them with my eyes, hoping they would say 'of course you can come home.' But instead mum shakes her head and looks me in the eyes,

"You're not ready to come home yet, I promise you that one day soon, we will be able to pick you up from this place and then everything will be alright." I nod, and try to smile at her as she puts her arms around me once more, and they turn to go to their car. I shake my head as they drive away and let the tears fall down my face, barely noticing Gemma besides me, I look at her for a moment when she puts her arms around me.

"I need to get away from here Gemma, please." I sigh as I watch them go back to their lives without me, it wasn't fair while I was stuck in here, I wanted to be happy again but I was never going to be happy here, I had no chance in a place I hated. Gemma just nodded, not needing to question me. She knew exactly how I felt because she felt the same. I smiled at her as I walked off to pack some stuff I would need. Tonight was going to be a long night.

- - - - - - - - - -

"Sonny?" I felt someone shaking my from my warm bed, and for a moment I forgot all our plans for that night. I looked at Gemma, suddenly remembering and scrambling out of my bed, grabbing a small bag hidden under my bed. I nod at her and run after her, frowning when we get to the gates. This was going to be the hardest part, once we were past this point it would be okay. They would have to find us, but it would be near impossible when we didn't want to be found.

I watch as Gemma scrambles to her knees and starts digging at the dirt, making a hole for us to climb under the gate. I soon copy her actions, grinning as I do so. This was our escape route, another half an hour and we would be happy. I smiled and carried on digging, ignoring the pain in my hands. This was the once chance I had and I wasn't going to give it up for anything.

Finally, we got through the small hole and onto the other side. I sighed and looked around,

"We need to move quickly, they will notice our empty beds soon." Gemma whispers, I nod at her and run through the trees with her.

Happiness.

Freedom.


	25. Selling Yourself

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Twenty Four ~ **

Sonny huddled up next to Gemma, trying to block out the freezing weather, ignoring their chattering teeth and shaking bodies. Gemma had been sick for the past few days since they got out of the place they called hell, she was pale and constantly shaking. Sonny knew she had to get the girl out of here but they had no money and begging wasn't working, she didn't know what to do.

There was no point in even talking to each other, they already knew what the other was thinking. She sighed and looked across the street as two large men walked towards them, Gemma closed her eyes and put her head on Sonny's shoulders. Sonny just stared at them, watching them as they looked at the two teenage girls, grinning at them.

She shook her head and finally looked away, hoping that they would get the hint and turn the other way. She wondered if she closed her eyes and pretended to be asleep then they would leave them alone,

"Hey beautiful." She opened her eyes again and looked at them, shooting them a dirty look, she watched Gemma open her own eyes and shift uncomfortably, looking from Sonny to the men nervously. She could already see the tears in the girls eyes, she shook her head and gently squeezed her hand, telling her it was going to be alright.

They were right in front of them now, staring down at them, winking, grinning, moving a little closer. Sonny retreated further back into the wall they had been sitting against,

"Leave us alone."

"Come on, you both must be starving, just a quick something, anything you want." She watched them reach for their pockets, bringing out their wallets, filled with money. She shook her head,

"We don't do anything like that, sorry." She muttered, Gemma was shaking, Sonny thought again for a moment. Gemma didn't, Sonny did.

"Just one of you then, come on." She sighed and then looked across the road at their car,

"Fine then, but she comes and stays in the car, okay?" Gemma looked at Sonny wide eyed and shook her head,

"Don't do it Sonny, we don't need the money badly."

"We need that bus ticket, we ain't going to get it through this alone." She lifted up the small bowl that they had used for collecting money from begging.

"We need more money, we need $50 and then we can do, I promise you that I am going to be fine, I have done this before, remember?" She referred to all the times she would do whatever she could, whatever they wanted, just for some money. No, not money.. drugs. Everything had been about drugs, more drugs, always had to get more, forgetting all feelings, be someone else. Drugs. Drugs. Drugs.

Now it was about getting out of there, running away from the life she had once loved. Running as far as they could from that prison, they didn't belong there. Sonny knew she needed help but she had gotten that and now she should be home and Gemma never should have been there in the first place. Sonny knew she would have done the same as Gemma if that had happened to her, anyone else would have if they couldn't get help for it.

She shook her head and pulled herself out of her own thoughts, ignoring the urge to run away from the two men in front of her. She could feel Gemma's hand getting tighter, clammier in her hands. She can hear her breath quicken, keeping up pace with Sonny's own heartbeat.

Sonny didn't feel so cold anymore, shaking because of how nervous she feels now. She wants to cry out in fear but she gets up because she knows that Gemma won't be able to last much longer. They needed to get away where they could start to forget about all the bad things they have done and move on from everything. So many bad things..

Sonny pulled Gemma up with her and led her behind the two men, walking towards their car.

"You don't have to do this." Gemma whispered, Sonny nodded as tears ran down her pasty face.

"I am going to be fine."

"No you won't, when you did all of this before you were high or drunk, you didn't actually want to do anything like that. You never would have done it if you had been sober, just like you don't want to do it right now. You only feel like you have to do this Sonny but I promise you that you don't." Sonny shook her head and turned away from her, sighing when they got the car.

The two men opened their back door, Gemma got in with a worried look on her face, Sonny looked around for a moment before climbing into the car. She grabbed Gemma's hand, closing her eyes, ignoring the greed and lust in the two men's eyes in the mirror, she had to do it for Gemma, for herself... she needed to get out of there.

"Stop!" Sonny shook her head and saw a man running towards the car, she looked at Gemma, neither of them knowing who these men were. She could feel tears running down her face once she thought about what men could possibly want from two teenage girls, two desperate teenage girls, homeless and cold. She shrugged as one of the men looked at her, questioning her. Thinking it was all her fault.

She looked down at her shaking hands as one of the men outside opened her side of the car door, they looked from Gemma to Sonny, shaking their heads and grabbing Sonny's arm.

"Allison Munroe and Gemma Winters?" They both nodded, biting down on their lower lips,

"Step out of the car please." Sonny felt herself stop shaking when she heard the authority in their voices,

"We are taking you back." Sonny shook her head and pulled her hand back, Gemma started to plead with them but they both knew that they had already won this battle, they knew it wouldn't stop them from leaving her again. Nothing was going to stop them from running away again, nothing or no one.


	26. Lady Macbeth

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Twenty Five ~ **

**~ Sonny ~ **

_I look around me, hearing footsteps not so far behind me. That's when I sprint, not looking where I am going, only seeing the blurs or objects, people.. only catching small glimpses of their faces. I don't stop to look; I want to but I can't. Someone is chasing me, they won't halter. I am forever guilty, forever in their debt, they are always going to be after me. I can feel it deep down, the shame, my conscious eating away at me; Telling me I have done something wrong, I just don't know it yet. What is it? What have I done? _

_That's when I fall over, and as I roll over, I look at the full moon in the sky and shake my head. Before I know it, I lift up my hands, looking at them in the silver light, it's glittering off something, a substance on my hands, but I don't know what it is. I can't see clearly, I bring them closer, noticing the red liquid dripping off them. I shake my head and quickly get up, not knowing, not comprehending where all the blood came from, and I keep wiping it away but it's back, it won't stop growing, dripping, someone is dying... fading... disappearing... dying.. _

_I can't shake the feeling that it's all my fault, I have done something, I have hurt someone and I don't know who. I carry on running, ignoring the blood, trying to think of something else. Then I look at someone in front of me, realizing who the blood is from; Gemma. I run over to her, screaming her name, she is just laying there. Pale and shaken, it's my fault.. it's all my fault and I, like Lady Macbeth, will never be able to get the blood off my hands._

I wake up suddenly and look around the room, I can feel my legs shake as I notice Gemma is not in her bed. I shake my head, she wouldn't do anything, she wouldn't do this to me. She wanted to be happy, she wanted it more than anything. I already know though, I know as soon as I approach her bed. I let a tear slide down my cheek and onto the small, pink, paper note laying on her cushion. Underneath it is her favorite teddy bear – Sam – I shake my head instantly knowing what this means. I take the note in my hands, scanning it, never taking in the words. I look around the room once more, and run out as fast as I can.

She wouldn't do this, please don't let her do this. Tears plummet down my face, leaving wet patches on my pale skin. I can feel my whole body shaking, my best friend could be dead right now and what can I do about it?

I should have woken up sooner.

I should have been there for her.

I should have saved her from coming back here.

I should have …

I should have...

I sigh as I close my eyes, reaching the gate, there is no hole though. She couldn't have made it, not yet. And that's when I hear her,

"Sonny?" I turn around and speed towards her, grabbing her before she collapses onto the dirt ground, clinging to a tree. I hold her in my arms and shake my head, not caring that my tears splash onto her.

"What did you take?"

"Don't worry." She stutters out, I shake her, trying not to damage her in anyway. I love her so much, she is my best friend, I can't have her leave me as well. I don't want to be alone. Don't let me be alone.

I fight the urge to run from all of this, to turn my back on her, scramble out of the gates and run, never stopping. I have said this so many times, I am meant to be a loner. I have always been alone, that's the way things were supposed to be. I ruined everything when I made friends, it's all my fault. This is all my fault.

I can feel my heart beating fast, too fast and I shake my head. "Help!" I scream as loud as I can,

"Please help me.." I whisper as Gemma touches my face with her freezing hand, smiling up at me.

"I will be okay now, I am going to be safe."

"No you're not going to be okay, please."

"I am sorry." She croaks out, I shake my head,

"No. Don't speak.. It's going to be okay,." I look around, hearing people shout, footsteps close.. closer.

"You have been an amazing friend, never forget that." I look away from her before looking into her eyes,

"Gemma, don't leave me. We are going to get out of here, we will be happy."

"No, you're going to be happy, I will never be happy again. I am giving you a chance. I don't want to burden you with me." I shake my head quickly, the tears never cease, still splashing onto her dressing gown.

"Don't leave me, you're not a burden, you're anything but that. Please."

"I love you." I shake my head,

"No, please. You're going to be okay." I watch her as she closes her eyes, still holding her in my arms, not hearing anyone come.

"Help." I whisper,

"No, don't die." I feel someone pull me off her, but I feel numb. The tears finally stopping, she isn't dead, it's just a dream, it's okay.

"Sonny what happened?"

"She wanted to die." I mutter as I am helped up by someone next to me, I don't see their faces, I only see Gemma's.

"She wanted to." I shake my head and feel the woman next to me grab my arm, "Come on." I follow her willingly, not fighting her. I don't have the energy to fight anymore. I don't want to.

I walk into the bedroom and stare at the note on the floor, I slowly pick it up. Only now reading it properly.

_Sonny, _

_I will be gone hopefully when you read this, I am so sorry that I couldn't be the friend you deserved so badly. I needed someone and you were always there for me, but because of everything I have always felt like I can never return the favor. I can never thank you enough for everything you have done for me, and I can't bare to burden you anymore, you are the only person who has ever believed me and I don't think I could ask for anything more off you. _

_I hope that one day you can see how much you deserve a normal, happy life. One filled with joy, family and a life. Don't let this eat you up anymore, don't let it destroy you. I have let this get the best of me, I let it kill me but I won't let it do the same to you._

_I am always going to watch over you. This is my favor to you. _

_I love you, my best friend forever. _

_Gemma _


	27. Running Again

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Twenty Six ~ **

"Look at me." Sonny watched Jane as she walked over to her, turning her head to look at the woman, she didn't move though, she didn't even flinch from the woman's cold touch. She slowly got down to her level and shook her head,

"Don't you dare blame yourself." Sonny doesn't say or do anything, she just stared ahead of her, never really listening, never caring, never really seeing. She thinks that it's all her fault, that dream she had... blood on her hands.. Lady Macbeth... Sonny was never going to be able to move on from this, she wasn't able to forget about Gemma and she wasn't going to obliterate that guilty feeling.

"Gemma was in so much pain and she felt like this was the only way out." Sonny nodded and she seemed surprised by her first reaction at all towards the death,

"Let me go home." Sonny whispered,

"Not yet, you're not ready."

"I am never going to be ready, please there are just too many bad memories here." She looked around slowly and then back at Jane, she can see the pleading, the desperation in Sonny's eyes and she can see the stubbornness and distrust in Jane's eyes. She knew that she wasn't going to let her go home, not until she can accept the fact that she won't try anything.

Sonny knew that she owed it all to Gemma to get over it, she wasn't going to let herself get that way again. She sighed and then got up of the seat, slowly able to ease herself out of the shock that she inevitably let take over her life since Gemma's death a week ago.

"I am sorry, but not yet."

"When then?" She looked out of the window, walking away from Jane as far as possible, afraid of losing her temper as she clenches her fist. She closes her eyes and think of her best friends and Chad for a moment, a time when she was happy and had everything she had ever wanted.

"I don't know when Sonny, as soon as I think you are ready."

"But I am ready now, I promise you, I can't be here anymore."

"I really am sorry." Jane shook her head, sitting down and looking through some papers. Sonny sighed as she ran fingers through her hair,

"Look, Gemma had real problems, major problems that she couldn't escape from. But I-I.. my problems are not like hers, I made my own problems, I can break away from my... predicament.. and I can move on with my life. She is never going to be able to do that, but I want to do this for the both of us. I was being selfish, making issues out of stuff that was never there, that was never important." She paused for a moment to think,

"I really did think I had problems at the time but I never did, I only thought I did, does that make me a bad person?" She wrinkled her nose, Jane shook her head,

"It doesn't but there are some issues you have yet to address. though. That sort of behaviour doesn't start for no particular reason. I know that Gemma and many others here, may have severe issues that they need to think about and address but that doesn't make them better or worse than you. Gemma killed herself, it wasn't the best option but.." Sonny looked at her and she pauses,

"She thought it was the best option okay? She did what she thought best for her. She couldn't handle in and out of this place for the rest of her life. You were killing her and so was her Dad, if he had only believed her then none of this would have happened. She would still be that happy girl she was before and she would be alive." Sonny sigh and looked away from her,

"She wanted to die, she always wanted to die after he told her she was a liar. She never thought about anything else, and with every failed attempt... She died a little more and it carried on and one day she did it, and I understand now that it wasn't my fault. If I hadn't have been here, she may have done it sooner. Just don't talk about Gemma, you have no right." She snarled at her as I turn around to face her. She looks shocked and hurt but Sonny didn't care, Gemma tried to tell her how she felt but she would never listen because she always thinks she is right.

"I think I am ready to go home now."

"And I don't think you are."

"Just listen to me, please... Gemma is happier now, I hope.. She didn't have hope and she didn't have a home to go to. But I do, please let me go." Sonny watch as she shakes her head and She lowers my head in defeat, not uttering another word as she grabs her bag and runs out of there.

- - - - - - - - - -

That night Sonny packed her bag as quickly as she could, taking everything this time. She wasn't planning on being caught and she wasn't planning on coming back. She was going to be okay, she was ready and even if Jane couldn't see that, her mum would. And if she didn't... Chad, Tawni, Nico, Grady or Zora would. Someone would see. Someone had to realize how far she had come. She knew it.


	28. Home

**Disclaimer: See last chapter**

**~ Chapter Twenty Seven ~ **

Sonny wandered around for a while, not really knowing where to go without any money. She hoped that she wouldn't attract any attention towards herself, just in case it would mean a trip back to that place.

She wanders around for days, endlessly looking for someone to help her, something that could aid her in phoning her mum.

Finally though, luck is on her side and in that moment she actually believes that Gemma is looking over her. She finds a poster for a local run away helpline centre – it was the answer she had been looking for. She could phone her mum and tell her that she was okay and then she could ask for her to pick her up as she wasn't that far from Hollywood anymore. She was going to beg for her to let her back home, inform her of how read she was and how much she just wanted to forget about it all.

"Mum?" Sonny whispers into the phone, clutching it like it's a lifeline, she can hear a sigh of relief as the woman on the other end of the phone mutters something to someone next to her. Sonny tries not to think anything of it, trying to focus on the reason she phoned in the first place,

"Mum? Please don't send me back there, I know I am in the wrong for running away but I swear to you that I am ready to come home, I promise you that I swear if I do anything wrong, anything you deem to be suspicious or anything like that.. you can hawk me back to that place straight away and I won't complain or run away from there again. I promise mummy, please..." Tears fall down her cheeks and she hears her sniff on the other side,

"I heard about your friend, I am so sorry baby."

"Mum, I need you to believe me when I tell you that I am ready, you have to believe me."

"I do baby girl, I know you want to come home and I want you here too."

"Really? You do? Can I come home now?" She looked around at the other teenagers, most of them on the phone, telling their parents and friends how they can't come back home, she laughed a little at the thought of her being the only one in the room begging to go home.

"How am I going to get home?"

"Chad is on his way to pick you up in the minute."

"Chad?"

"Yeah, he is her right now, he is so worried about you and he has been here every single day since you left, he misses you so much and so do I."

"I miss you both too." She smiled and then looked around,

"I am about a four hour drive away from the house." She can hear her tell Chad and then he asks Sonny's exact location, Sonny closes her eyes, grinning as she tells her mum. She was going home and that was all that mattered.

- - - - - - - - - -

"Sonny?" She looked up from her seat and grinned at the boy in front of her, standing up quickly and shrugging at him, a light blush creeping up on her cheeks as she looked at the boy,

"I missed you so much." He whispers, gathering her in his strong arms and kissing her with more passion than she ever thought possible. She gasped a little when they both pulled back and then wrapped her arms around his neck, and she knew that this was what real happiness felt like.

"I am not going to let you hurt again." He says as he takes her hand and puts her into his car, she nods and then watches him climb into the drivers seat.

"I love you Chad Dylan Cooper."

"I love you too Allison May Munroe." He smiled a little and then shook his head before driving off,

"We need to get you home, your mum is waiting to wrap her arms around you." She nodded and then looked out of her window.

It was over, the worst part was finished, complete. She was going to be okay, her life was going back to normal. Happiness could be find, even if it seemed like she had fought so hard to obtain it in the first place. But in the end she knew that she achieved the one thing she had been looking for – love.

She finally found the one person she had been looking for, the person she loved more than anything else in the whole world, she was just a little late realizing who it was but then again, she laughed to herself as she thought about it – she had always been a little slow.

She laughed loudly at the grin on Chad's face, she was home, this was her home and she was planning on staying there this time.

"**Love is always patient and kind, it is never jealous, love is never boastful or ****conceited; it is never rude or selfish; it never does take offence and is not resentful. Love takes no pleasure in other peoples sins but delights in the truth; it is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope and to endure whatever comes. Love does not come to an end."**

**~ The End ~ **

**A/N: Please let me know what you thought! And what did you think of the quote? I thought it suited the story, but what about you?**

**Thank you for any feedback. **


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